Hearts on Things Above

People are People

2012-03-09T01:29:00.000-05:00

I look back and think about all the people that have touched my life. There are obvious ones like my parents, siblings, grandparents and close friends. Then there are those further out like teachers, friends and acquaintances. There are those that I never thought would matter.
I've found that the ones who mean the most to me outside of my close family are those that I would never have dreamed I would have anything in common with. It is so easy to adopt the stuck up, selfish and honestly... lazy way of not getting involved in the lives of those that don't seem to have much in common with you. Even in church we usually hang out with those who are like us. Those who are well-dressed and have a nice car sitting out in the parking lot, generally talk to those who are well-dressed and have a nice car sitting in the parking lot. The outcasts stick by their own. The young stay with the young. The old, with the old.

I often wonder what we would do if we saw into the hearts of those around us. Just think. Maybe that lady you passed in the grocery store that you hardly know is in desperate need of someone just asking her if she needs prayer? What if that tough guy is really overcome with grief? What if that old lady sitting on the back pew just wishes someone would give her a hug? Have you thought that the girl who never frowns is afraid deep down?

I'm so thankful for a Mom and Dad who taught me something important. My Dad said, "people are people and that is reason enough to show them love." There is no one not worth trying to fight for. You may wonder how you know when to reach out and how not to be taken advantage of. Well, the Lord often shows you who is honest and who isn't. But honestly, being taken for granted comes with the territory.

I'll never forget the many times my Dad would take time to talk to the one who seemed to be a waste of time to talk to. He hugged the one who seemed mean and I watched their heart break. He mentored the prodigal and I watched a heart change and a life of love for God explode.

We as Christians need to realize that it's time to step out. I'm not saying join the "bad", but I am saying get your hands dirty. Take time to talk. Take time to listen. Take time to teach. If followers of Christ would open our eyes and stop looking at our lives and what is comfortable... we could change our homes, our churches, and all around us. We can't just say we love people and yet not involve them in our lives. The best way to reach people for Christ is to move past the surface and dig. Dig by investing in them and showing you care.

My friend Jason Church praying with a guy on the side of the road on the drive to Weslaco, TX with his wife Katie to be missionaries to the people there and across the boarder in Mexico. Talk about showing love! Just get out of your car and do it like Jason!

Jesus has called us to do more than occupy a pew or chair on Sunday. He has called us to burn like fire inside with the desire to LOVE people and guide them... just like He loved worthless old you and worthless old me and showed us the way Home. And what's even better... there are rewards... like relationships that last a lifetime.

Visitors, Speaking and a Thanks

2012-02-24T13:19:00.001-05:00

I've noticed that I'm not the only one who has neglected Blog World because of life's craziness. It's been a busy few weeks. Busy is not always good, but this busy really has been pretty good. It's also made me feel like it's been longer since I've blogged because the temperature is in the 70's outside! I walked out this morning and literally got hot. Crazy.

So, what's been happening? This past weekend Dr. Black, Mrs. Black and my dear friend from the Alaba, Ethiopian church, Nigusee visited. It was wonderful having them here. They arrived Saturday afternoon and stayed through Sunday lunch. Saturday we sat around after supper and sang songs that we have sang in Ethiopia in years past. It was glorious. I missed Ethiopia worse at that moment than I have in a long time. I missed all my Ethiopian friends and sitting around in the cool night air with the smoky smell of Africa and the raised voices of Amharic in song. There is nothing like it anywhere, ever.

Mrs. Black and Nigusee spoke Sunday morning. It was amazing to say the least. The presence of the Lord was so real there. I learned that when the Lord is "with you" like Nigusee said He was "with" Joseph in the Bible, then we can do many things. With Him only.

I can't tell you what a blessing it was to have such wonderful friends and honestly, family, here.

Then, last night, my Dad and I spoke at a Father Daughter banquet. I got the privilege to teach on a great passion of mine: saving your heart. It was a dream come true to get to stand in front of many young ladies and share with them what the Lord has revealed to me about dating, relationships and such. It was a beautiful evening, indeed.

Kandace and me singing

Well, thank you for taking precious time out of your day to read my blog. I don't think I thank my readers enough for following my life and ramblings about things the Lord is showing me. You could be cleaning your house (if you're like me, you're like, "Yeah, right") or something else right now, but you are here reading this. Thanks. I hope you all have a wonderful day. Enjoy the blessings of life and remember to live each day like it's your last. Life shouldn't be measured in years, but rather by what you do with the years you're given. I can't believe it's already almost March! Time flies, but God is outside of time. Makes, life seem mighty sweet, indeed.

Love is More

2012-02-14T15:14:00.001-05:00

I didn't fall off the earth! It's been almost two weeks since I've blogged. I'm pretty sure that is a record. But today is a special day, Valentine's Day and I must blog about it! Today is the "day" of love. For me, Valentine's Day has never meant that much, but this year I see especially that love is something that is unconfined to a single day in February. It is also something that doesn't have to be just romantic. In English we have one word for love... love. You can "love" pizza like you can "love" your wife. You can "love" your brother and "love" your neighbor. We "love" that movie and "love" God. What is love? Dictionary.com came up with these three as the top definitions for the noun and verb "love":

a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.

a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.

sexual passion or desire.

I believe that love in our culture has been put down, trampled upon and overused. We love everything regardless of whether we should. It amazes me how young couples will tell each other they love each other but they don't even know if they really do. They've dated for a week. They are attracted to each other and may like each other, but isn't there a time and a place for love? Love is so much bigger than what we've made it. True love was shown upon a filthy cross over 2,000 years ago when God's Son died for our sins. That is love. Love is a man willing to lay down his life for his wife. Love is a Christian telling her persecutor that she forgives him. Love is huge. True love is unconditional. There is a time and place for the that word. And it doesn't belong where we often place it.

Jesus tells us to love. Often when He talks about love, He isn't telling us just to "say" it, but to show it. Maybe we could stop saying that we love things so much and live it. If you love someone, show them. If you love the lost, find them and tell them of the greatest Lover of all time. If you love something it will be bigger and greater than "like." You will do anything for that person or that thing.

This Valentine's Day, remember true love, not the muddied version of the world. Show your love all the time and remember the greatest example of love. God sent His Son to the world. Why? Because He loves us. Did He have to? No. He meant His love and He showed us. If you mean you love someone or something. Show it. Show it always, when it's hard, when it's easy, when you feel like it, when you don't feel like it. Show it and they'll know.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Running in Water

2012-02-01T11:39:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it is actually February 1st! It's been over a year now since I began this blog and actually a year ago today I wrote the blog Dating? Can't believe it's been a year! It's amazing to me that in the moment, time stands still. It literally feels like time won't move.... at least it feels that way to me. But when I look back I am amazed how time really has flown. Have you ever tried to run in a swimming pool? I used to do that all the time. It was nearly impossible. The water is so much thicker than air and it pulls you back. That's how life feels sometimes, like I'm running in water. I'm running the race set before me, but I feel like it's in the ocean instead. Then at other times it feels like I'm soaring on wings like eagles.

Clara and Andrew were going to play outside and asked me about which areas in the woods are good places to play. See, my home is surrounded, to an extent, by rather thick forests. It wasn't so many years ago that my cousins, Taylor and Leah, my sister Kandace and I played in those woods. We had countless hideouts. There was the "fallen log" (which was simply a large tree fallen over to make a bridge), there were "the clearings" (just areas in the woods where there were few trees), the "dam" at the creek, there were "churches" in the woods, houses, and stores. You name it, we probably had it if it would have been around in the 1800s.

So, Clara and Andrew wanted to know where to go. I had one of those "re-live my childhood in like 10 seconds" moments. I couldn't believe they're almost the age I was when I was playing out there. I wanted to go dress up in a prairie dress and play with them! But then I thought, "I'm almost 18... that's not normal." So, I went on the tell them about where they could play. Most of our hideouts were grown up, or the paths are bocked by trees.

My point? I don't really know myself. I guess it's just to say, enjoy life for the moment you're in. We can always be hoping for tomorrow or next month, but what what about today? Last month I was looking forward to February, so I'm going to try to not get caught up in March! Each day is a blessing of its own. I fail at this so often, but I want to live in the moment. That doesn't mean never think about the future... you have to plan ahead, but I guess it means, don't worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow has enough worry of its own. God is not so concerned about the destinations in our lives as He is the journey to them. Enjoy the journey and run the race.... even if you feel like you're running in water.... with seaweed and jellyfish and sharks and..... Yeah, you get the point.

Having to Trust

2012-01-27T16:30:00.004-05:00

We've all had to trust something or someone. Every time I get on an airplane I think of trust. I trust the pilot that he knows what he is doing. I have no idea who he is, but I get in a metal tube that he is going to take 35,000ft in the air and I trust that he can get us up there, keep us there and then land us safely. I also trust in the plane, that the wings aren't going to fall off because of pressure. That is trust.

I have never been one to enjoy putting trust in things or people very much. I'm the girl who is sceptical going over bridges, over analyzes things and triple tests everything. But I've found that being a Christian is all about trust. We have to completely trust that God is there and that He knows what He is doing. Often, I just want to say, "Lord, I want to know everything! Just show me the future. I don't really like not knowing." That's not the way it works. I have to trust. It's just that simple.

Blessed is the man who makes
the LORD his trust,
who does not turn to the proud,
to those who go astray after a lie! Psalm 40:4

So. I'll make this short and simple. Trust Jesus. I am so bad to try to figure things out on my own, cause I think I can handle it and then suddenly I'm on my face. Sometimes literally! See, we're in a tech world, but no amount of technology or worldy intelligence will bring the peace, trusting in God brings. You can't buy or sell it. You can't Google it, find it on Facebook or Youtube.

A really good friend of mine reminded me of these verses:

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the LORD.... Jeremiah 29: 12-14a

If you're like me, you may say, "I do trust Him! And I ask Him for help, yet I don't hear anything!" Well, first of all, we have to be clean before God. He can't see through our sin. If you come before Him with a clean heart and truly desire to know His will, He will not be silent. However, He has told me to wait. I have felt that my prayers have bounced off the ceiling, but they haven't and I know that. He was telling me to wait. I say Psalms 40:1 to myself all the time... I mean ALL the time. It says, "I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to be and heard my cry." Sometimes I feel that He wants us to hold on. Then, sometimes He tells us to do something that is crazy! Sometimes it doesn't make sense. Trust Him. Trust Him. Even when there is no answer, trust Him. Just trust Him.

Unlike us, Jesus never messes up

For Granted

2012-01-24T17:06:00.002-05:00

There is a child. His father has told him that whatever he does, no matter how bad, that he is forgiven because he is his son. However, the father has told the son, that though he is forgiven and will always be loved no matter what, to still strive to be good and to please him. The son loves the father, and is thankful for his loving forgiveness. But he can't help but realize that since he is indeed forgiven and will always be, that perhaps he doesn't have to try so very hard. After all, his father has forgiven everything! The child begins to slowly slip at giving his best. Suddenly, when the father is asking his son not to do something, the son doesn't do most of it, but he still lingers on the edge. He reminds himself that his father will always love him and forgive him. Before long, the son is going completely against his father's wishes. After he does what he knows is wrong, he'll come up to his father and say, "Look, Dad, I'm sorry. Shouldn't have done that. Thanks for your forgiveness. You're so faithful." Within a few days, he's done it again. The father shakes his head as his relationship with his son slips. The son is confident that it's okay, because he is forgiven! Grace and love covers it all. Meanwhile the father can't talk to his son because of the wall of wrong between him and his son. Yes, he still loves him, but he is disappointed that his son is taking advantage of his forgiveness.

This story reminds me of the new Christian philosophy out there. I cringe when I hear people say that Jesus' love covers our sins and then they say or do something that is so very against what God has called us to be. Jesus has indeed washed our sins away, but why should we keep sinning because they're taken care of? If we love Jesus then we should do EVERYTHING we can to not add any more sin to our lives. It has to crush God like it crushed the father in the story to see us often take for granted His love. There is grace and love and mercy.... but beside it must be obedience. Many believers seem to ignore this. Jesus expects us to "be perfect for He is perfect." Now, I know we are never going to get perfect and that is where many Christians stop. We're never going to be perfect so let's just not try, right? I can be "me" and God is fine with that. No, He is not fine with that. Honestly, neither you nor me are at all good on our own. The only thing good in us is Him. We must strive to be perfect even though we will never get there. Jesus wants us to try. We really aren't free to be, say and live how we want. We are free in Christ to be what He wants us to be and that is so much better than what we can do for ourselves.

Sounds harsh, doesn't it? This whole topic has been on my heart lately. I've seen that it's not okay to linger around the edge of sin just because we know He has forgiven us. If you and I love someone we're not going to hurt them by doing exactly what breaks their heart because we know they'll still love us. There are many Christian songs, Christian teachers and Christian books that would disagree with me. They stand firmly on the "love" side only. But we must understand that God is righteous and He wants us to stop sinning. It's not cute or sweet to do things we know are wrong because we can get away with it. That is simply watered down theology. We need to remember where our sin put our Savior. On a cross.

The story would be so good if it could end where the son comes back and says nothing but no longer lives a life that is contrary to what he says. The son shows through his actions that he indeed loves his father and because he is forgiven he won't sin, not because he sins he is forgiven. Before long the father and son are close again and the son is free. He is not free to be himself, but is free to be exactly what is perfect for him, exactly what his father planned.

The Shoes in Carnegie Hall

2012-01-16T14:44:00.001-05:00

On top of the Empire State Building

I've been in New York City since Wednesday. Yesterday my Mom, Kandace and I flew home after a beyond words, incredible five days. I can honestly say that NYC is almost the complete opposite of what I'm used to. It was fast-paced, loud, bright, and highly tech. My mouth hung open from the moment I stepped off the plane. Wednesday night we walked down Times Square and I was on stimulation overload at all the screens. Thursday morning we had rehearsal and then that night we went to see Wicked. I've always wanted to see a Broadway show and I was beside myself. Friday we had rehearsal in the morning as well and then went to the Empire State building at night. I have never been so cold in my life. I am not exaggerating. The wind chill was below zero on top of the tallest building. As much as the cold took my breath, the view did more. Saturday was the big day. They said to take it easy, but we went ice skating at Central Park instead. Surrounded by tall city building and the Plaza hotel was crazy. I couldn't skate well, but I gave it all I had! That afternoon after cleaning up I stepped onto the Carnegie Hall stage for the first time. I went dizzy from the thrilling overload. I've seen few things as beautiful as the view from that stage. The rehearsal flew by and suddenly I was getting ready for the concert of a lifetime. The rest was a dream. I sang with all of my heart. The crowd applauded and I basked in the moment and the wonder of the Lord's presence. I stepped to the front of the stage to sing in an ensemble and I tried to let it sink in that I was standing at the front of the grandest stage in the world. All the music was glorious. The orchestra and hundreds of people in the choir vibrated the Hall. The Annie Moses Band played more beautifully than I've ever heard them. I'm not sure if music can sound more beautiful than what was in that Hall Saturday night.

After the concert we kissed it goodbye and loaded onto the cruise. I watched in wonder as NYC passed by, the lights of the buildings shimmering on the water. At about 1 am the Statue of Liberty drew near and I stepped out on the deck to join the others in singing "God Bless America" as we gazed at the magnificent and extremely tall Statue literally directly in front of us. We returned to our hotel at 3 am and I slept. We awoke and flew home leaving NYC for the mountains of NC.

This is where the story really begins. You may ask why I named this blog post "The Shoes in Carnegie Hall." Well, it began while I was sitting on the Carnegie Hall stage during rehearsal. I looked down at my feet while I was waiting for my turn to sing and something hit my like a ton of bricks as I looked at my shoes. They were one of my favorite pair of shoes. They are just plain black shoes with a strap. I love to wear them. I wear them a lot, because they work for comfort and look nice too. But it hit me that I had worn them in Ethiopia. In fact, I wore them to the most rural village we went to... Mt. Geleye. They had walked on the ground of some of the most extreme poverty in the world. I looked up and saw where I was then. Carnegie Hall's golden glow almost became a blur as I looked back down. Those shoes had gone from the two most opposite places. From the depths of Africa to the most famous and beautiful Hall in the world. God spoke to me the simple words, "And so you go. You have shared Me with the Ethiopians and you will share Me with those here tonight. And, you are to share Me with everyone in between." Just as my shoes had seen the two extremes, so had I. God told me that He sees them both and all between. Even my little town of Wilkesboro. He told me to be used wherever I am. Everywhere. Beautiful are the feet of those that bring the good news, says Romans 10:15. I choked up as I remembered the persecuted in Africa and then as I thought of the many confused city people that rush through the bright streets of NYC and then of everyone in between.

It may sound crazy but, my shoes reminded me to go. Go. Go. Go to my church and use my gift there. Go to Mexico and serve there. Go to Africa and serve there. Go to NYC and serve there. Go where Jesus says. For now I'm at home and I'm determined not to get down because the excitement is over. It has only begun. God has stamped my heart with a mission. I am to make Him known through my actions, words I write, music I play and sing and the smile on my face. I won't let Him down. Will you? Will you? He has so much planned and it starts with a, "Yes, Lord. Use me."

Into the Light

2012-01-06T12:25:00.001-05:00

Last time I talked about being in the darkness. The darkness is often where our lives are transformed. Muscle isn't built by sitting on the couch and faith isn't strengthed where it is easy.
It came to my mind yesterday of an occurrence that happened in Ethiopia that I'd rather have forgotten. But I was complaining about something when I suddenly remembered the second night in Alaba, Ethiopia and waking up to the terrorized cries of Kandace. I was exhausted so I tried to wake up enough to see if it was anything worth waking up for. She was lying beside of me and was literally vibrating. It was a fog as I heard Dad run up to the bed. That's when I heard the tell-tale sound of vomiting. At that moment I wanted to die. I was more angry about my circumstances than I think I had ever been. Being sick is one thing in America, but when you are in a foreign country, away from home, with no running water and only 13 years old it is different. That was darkness. I'll never forget getting out of the bed and sleeping on the twin bed with Dad. I cried. Kandace was miserable and sick and it was only day two. It couldn't be happening. I prayed with all of my soul. I prayed that we would make it to daylight. I remember glancing at the clock and being shocked when I saw it said 11:30pm. We hadn't been asleep for two hours when Kandace got sick. It was going to be a long night. And it was. Right before she got sick the second time I ran out the door and stood outside. I inhaled the aroma of Africa and listened to my Daddy pray in the room behind me. I selfishly began to think about how Dad and I both were going to be sick too. Satan attacked my mind with horrifying fears that it would be like it was in 2009 when Dad got sick. It was happening again. It's over. 9 more days of this. I went to bed and fell into a fitful sleep. Kandace had a nightmare around 4:30. The Muslim Crier began being played over the loudspeakers. It seemed that all of Alaba could here the eerie sound of a Muslim praying to Allah. It broke my heart. If it wasn't already, it did then. I lay there listening to it and praying for daylight. Just a little light. A few moments later I glanced at the window and I saw the hazy morning light. Kandace woke up weak, but improved. I'll never forget the words she told Daddy. There was a look on her face I'd never seen on her as the sunlight shown through the curtain. She said weakly, "Hey Daddy, last night.... I felt God."

Every tear was worth going to Ethiopia. People may wonder why you would put yourself through that. It is hard, but I feel God there like I never have here. We have it too easy. I wouldn't trade those hard times for anything because that is when God wrapped His arms around me tightest. We had a mission there... to tell hundreds of children about Jesus' love.

So, I told you that story so that you would see an experience I've had in the dark. You've had them too. Whether it was when you were sick or when you were just broken down. Maybe it was when a family member was going through something. Or it could be just not knowing. Not knowing God's plan. That is the dark.

Well, there is morning. The sun has to rise. Since my last post the Lord has been showing me things and encouraging me. I feel like He just wants me to have to trust Him. When I finally let go, He can work. It's like when I was a kid and I always got my necklaces in a knot. I would work on getting them untangled constantly but I just made it worse. Mom would ask if she could help, but I was determined to do it myself! She would just shrug and walk off. Finally, I would give up. I would take it to her but then I'd keep trying to untangle it while she was working on it too. That didn't work either! I had to let go completely. When I did, she always fixed it. It's the same with life. Sometimes you have to let go. I love something my Dad said. I think that we were in Ethiopia when he said it. He said, "If you hold life loosely, it won't hurt so much when it is jerked at."

Put your life in Jesus' hands. But you can't forget one more thing... you must LIVE FOR HIM. Many say they trust Him but where is the fruit to prove it? Live in a way that shows that your life is in His hands. We will go through darkness but Hallelujah we will come into the light! The fact is, Jesus is the Light, so if you're with Him, you're never in utter darkness.

Even in the Darkness

2012-01-02T15:12:00.002-05:00

The second day of 2012. I was completely surprised when I saw on my dashboard "100 posts." This is officially my 101 post on Hearts on Things Above! I've loved every moment of blogging thus far. It's almost been a year since I began this blog!

At the start of this new year I'm finding it a little easy to get overwhelmed. To be honest with you, ever since getting home from Ethiopia I've just enjoyed the Christmas bliss, but now everything starts back. I had tried to just enjoy December and not get caught up in January arriving, but it's here and I'm staring at it. And of course, these are the last few months of school for me. What I've known my whole life is going to take a little shift. I'm not going off to college though. I've chosen to stay home and do it online. The Lord hasn't really shown me what I'll be doing yet. So, I guess I'm trying to say that things look a little gray in the future. Sometimes God just says, "trust me." He doesn't want me to know everything.

That is so hard for me. I want to know everything. I want things to be how they've always been. It scares me sometimes that things change. But yet at the same time I'm happy that the Lord is doing and preparing great things. Sometimes I feel a little in the dark though. But in the darkness, the Light is so much brighter. There is one thing I know without a shadow of a doubt, that I will follow Jesus. If nothing else, if I never know again God's will, I will follow Jesus. Now, I know that I'll know God's will at some point. But if I think about it, what if I never got another blessing? What if we were to never get another blessing? It reminds me of Job and how almost everything was taken away from him. I love the lyrics from the song "Broken Praise" from "The Story" I blogged about a couple weeks ago.

But You were the One who filled my cup

And You were the One who let it spill

So blessed be your Holy name if you never fill it up again

If this is where my story ends, just give me one more breathe to say

Hallelujah

See, we've been given all we need! Jesus has paid our debt! God owes us nothing, but yet He still gives. Can you and I say "Hallelujah" regardless of what is surrounding us? It is easy to say hallelujah when we are surrounded by Christmas lights, tons of food and many presents, but it gets harder when life starts back, when things are a little more difficult. Let me tell you, we can say hallelujah because we're happy or because we're joyful. Joy isn't dependent on circumstances. It is often a choice. I am choosing to be joyful. I'm choosing to trust God. Will you? He's never let His children down and He's not going to start now.

I will turn the darkness before them into light,
the rough places into level ground.
These are the things I do,
and I do not forsake them. Isaiah 42:16b

It makes me think of that old hymn we used to sing at church, "I have decided to follow Jesus, no turning back" and then the next verse,"though none go with me, I still will follow." I'll follow in the dark or light, in the rain or sun, over mountains or valleys. I may stumble and fall, but He promised He'd never leave me and you know what? I trust Him.

Kissing 2011 Goodbye

2011-12-30T20:42:00.001-05:00

Just one more day left of 2011! Can you believe it? It's been a good year. The Lord has done many wonderful things this year in my life, my family's life and my church's life. It has been a blessing. I've learned to trust the Lord in all new ways. I pray that you have grown closer to God this year. That you can look back and see that He has stretched you, used you and taught you. That is what our true hope should be for 2012 as well. So many things that we think matter in our future, really don't matter that much. It matters that we are following Jesus and that our families are. It matters that we tell others about Him. We should work our hardest and do all we do to bring glory to our Creator. We are so blessed. If we know Jesus, we will be blessed in 2012 regardless of whatever bad or good happens. There is no reason to live in fear or anxiety. He sees the beginning and the end and nothing that happens next year will take God by surprise. So, bye to 2011 and hello 2012!

Exciting news! My Mom has finally begun to blog! Today she blogged for the first time and I am honored to present to you the sage wisdom of Pam Brown displayed in Silver Linings and Such. I'm more than confident you will want to learn about the mother of a strange child like me! You may wonder what she could possibly have to say (and for that matter, what I could possibly have to say!), but the life of a homeschool, Pastor's family is more exciting than you think!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

2011-12-24T20:57:00.001-05:00

Well, all....Merry Christmas!!! I really love Christmas Eve because the end of the celebration is not yet really in view. It's the day every year when the anticipation is at its height. It is not quite Christmas, but almost! Months of preparation build up and right now it is peaking. I'm still having a hard time believing that tomorrow is Christmas and an even harder time that 2011 is almost over! We really need to enjoy every moment because time really does fly.

Enjoy this time with those around you. These days are for making memories and celebrating the fact that the Son of God came to earth to save us, actually every day is. But this truly is "the most wonderful time of the year" in my opinion. Remember the One from whom all blessings flow. He deserves all praise. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Happy Anniversary!!

2011-12-22T07:12:00.003-05:00

I need to tell you about the two best parents I know. The father being my very own, Kevin Brown and the mother being my very own as well, Pam Brown. They are the best couple you can imagine and today is their Anniversary! They have been married 21 years and I'm extra happy they got married because I came along because of it!

My parents are unusual. They rarely ever fight. The way they act in public is really how they act. Dad and Mom support one another, encourage one another and love one another. They are a true example of how a husband and wife should be according to the Bible. I'm not saying they're perfect. No one is. But they always do one thing. Settle problems. I have never seen a cold shoulder between them. They may disagree but they always settle the problems. They realize that marriage takes three and the third is God. He really is the first because things are done through Him.

I say all of this to say that I love my parents. I'm blessed and honored to be their daughter. I wish them a very Happy Anniversary. The one thing that I wish they hadn't have done in all the time they've been together was getting married three days before Christmas!

The Love of Christmas

2011-12-19T16:16:00.002-05:00

It's that time of year!! Fudge, cookies, old Christmas music, lights and decorations, corny and predictable Hallmark movies, red and green, fellowship and merriness. Christmas. I'm completely amazed that it is 5 1/2 short days till Christmas! I really can't believe that it is already here. But I better start believing it because it will be over before I know it.

So, to share Christmas joy with others, on Saturday I went along with some friends from the Monday night Bible Study I go to, to give clothes, food, and the love of Jesus to homeless in Winston Salem. I never fail to be amazed when I'm doing mission work. Over 220 people came and many received coats and clothes to battle the fierce cold. And it was cold bright and early that morning. Two of the men in the group took off their own coats to give to the homeless. I was amazed at the love of the group. Before we knew it the homeless were bringing brand new clothes they'd received from other homeless shelters to give to us as a sort of "trade" for what they took. Many refused to take even when it was obvious they needed it. They would go tell their friends and leave some clothes for others. Needless to say, it was a great blessing to be apart of the that ministry. Mission work is always a great blessing!

Back to Christmas. I still just can't believe it's here... but you already know that. Lately I've been thinking about all the gifts and I've realized that they really don't mean that much to me anymore. Since just coming home from Ethiopia 2 1/2 weeks ago and then serving the homeless, I've just seen how spoiled we really are. It's not bad to give gifts and to have money to buy gifts, but I guess where I get stuck is when we become nearly obsessed with them. We can say that we're not, but compared to the starving and cold world around us.... we are. We get so surrounded by the "American Christmas" that we forget. What do we forget? We forget that the very One who came on that first Christmas came as a sacrifice. He came because He loves us, SO we must love others like that.

Show extra love to others this week, especially widows and widowers and those who are hurting. We never really know who is hurting so that means, love everyone!!! I'll try to blog again before Christmas but by then you all will be too busy to read this. I want to wish a very Merry Christmas to all! And as Tiny Tim says, "God bless us, every one!!"

The Story

2011-12-10T16:00:00.000-05:00

Adam......Abraham..... Joseph..... Moses...... Ruth.... David.... Daniel... Esther.. Job. Mary. Paul.

We all know them. The people of the Bible. They've been on countless Sunday School lesson pictures, countless books. They've been preached about, taught about, sung about. They are the chosen people that are in the Bible.

But they were real people. They were afraid. They were unworthy. They were sinful. Liars, murders, slaves, foreigners, adulterers, lost, afraid. Yet, they were faithful, trusting, courageous, loving, and patient. That is why we remember them.

Last night I went to a concert called "The Story." It was made up of songs to tell the story from Genesis to Revelation of 18 different Bible characters. The songs were each incredible and sounded just like what you would imagine the people they talked about to sound like. The lyrics just touched my heart. There were many impressive artists there including Steven Curtis Chapman, Natalie Grant, Francesca Battistelli, Selah, and Newsboys. Max Lucado spoke between some of the songs.

It was incredible how in three and half hours you saw the hearts of many of the Bible characters I've "known" my whole life. But to see them as more than just another person, but instead as a small story inside a larger one. They aren't random people, but part of the tapestry. Each of their burdens and victories help show the power of God.

I am apart of that story too. I'm not in the Bible, but I am a child of the King. I'm a heir. God wrote my story and He sees the beginning and end. He sees where it fits in the big story and He knows my purpose. Sitting listening to the sweet lyrics of the songs, I could only thank Him for letting me be apart of such a story and for writing it in the first place.

The lyrics of the song, "How Love Wins" (the song of the Thief on the cross) touched my heart like no other.... Please read these words:

This is how Love wins, every single time
Climbing high upon a tree where someone else should die
This is how Love heals, the deepest part of you
Letting Himself bleed into the middle of your wounds
This is what Love says, standing at the door
You don't have to be who you've been before
Silenced by His voice, death can't speak again This is how Love wins

Climbing high upon a tree where sinful man should die. I know the story, but it helped me see the picture. And to be reminded that I'm apart of it. I'm called to live for King Jesus. So are you. We are called to let Him cover and fill our everything. Max Lucado said something last night that stuck with me, "Eventually, if you let Him, Jesus will fill you up so much that there is more Him in you than there is you in you."

That's my desire. I want to be like the people in The Story. They were unworthy, afraid, and sinful. But they were faithful. When the Spirit called they answered and changed history. It may not have seemed big at the time when Moses was in the weeds, or when David was in the fields, or when Ruth was a heartbroken widow. Looking from the outside, if you were to have walked up on the cave the night of Jesus' birth you may would have smiled and walked on thinking, "Another poor child. Born in a filthy rotten manger, how sad." You and I would have walked on.

The story is made up of little things. It is made up of seemingly unimportant people. The story is not just today.... it is for forever. Max Lucado also said, "You're life is not just the tiny dash between your birthdate and date of death on your tombstone." It is forever. The story is written. We must live it and praise God for it and finally, tell everyone about it.

Click How Love Wins (Singer- Steven Curtis Chapman) to here the full song. Here are a few more of my favorites....

**Your Heart (David)** (Singer- Chris Tomlin)

Alive (Mary Magdalene) (Singer- Natalie Grant)

The Great Day (The Second Coming) (Singers- Michael W. Smith and Natalie Grant)

Be Born in Me (Mary) (Singer- Francesca Battisteli)

To see them all and learn more visit, The Story.

A Heart Not Torn

2011-12-05T17:02:00.000-05:00

I blogged on this very subject back in February. Relationships. Romantic ones. It's a touchy subject. I usually get a little flack when I broach upon it, but oh well, I do anyway!

I've felt led to go to this subject again because it weighs so heavily on my heart. It is such a difficult topic though because so many don't like to think about this angle of relationships.

It's like I've said before, young tweens and teens dating each other just for fun is really dangerous. Like gas and fire. I have known and know countless teenagers who have promised themselves and others that they were just not going to get their hearts get tangled, but soon enough it is bound to happen... and it does. It continues to amaze me the amount of teens that wrap themselves in such problems. It doesn't have to be something that you just do. Something so serious should be pleasing to God and at the right time. God's time.

It's something that we should at least think about. We can't tell ourselves that it doesn't matter. 97% of highschool seniors are no longer pure. That is crazy. Let me just put it out there... it is not bad to wait. It isn't bad to trust God for the right one.

Another thought. If you are a Christian, shouldn't your very first desire be for that person you get into a relationship with be a Christian as well? Many teens have said to me something like this, "Well, I really think he's saved. He has the Bible as his "favorite" book on Facebook and his parents go to church. His Dad may even be a deacon." That's all great, but if you don't know almost immediately, then there is a problem. We should never have to guess or think he or she may be a Christian because of their parents or upbringing.

Okay, Katy. So what do you think is appropriate?? Well, it isn't about what I think, it is about the Word and it says...

1 Thessalonians 4:3 It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4 that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, 5 not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God.

Ephesians 5:3 But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people.

Not even a hint. So for me that means none. Pretty simple actually. I just don't date, it makes it easier. Some may wonder, "How in the blue blazes are you ever going to find someone?" Well, I'm not going to find someone. I don't have to. God has him chosen for me. God will bring him to me or me to him. I could know him now or I may not. I don't have to "put myself out there" to find out. A lady in my church named Kathy Eller once gave an example when I was very young. She may not even remember this, but it stuck with me. We were at a girl's sleep over and she talked about dating and relationships. She had a paper heart and said that it is new and fresh and as we date and break-up it gets torn. She ripped small pieces of it off and threw them on the floor. She said that when you kiss your boyfriend, their goes some of your heart and when you tell each other things not meant for each other's ears, there goes more of your heart. She told us that one day you get married and she showed us the scrap of heart left. "And this is all you have left." I'll never forget that. This is all you have left.

Many already know this stuff. They know that God has their future spouse chosen and much of what I've said is old hat. But the culture can easily seep in and suddenly we're recreational dating. And it's "not serious." Not serious dating is the worst kind, because when you're not serious and just having "fun" you have no purpose in what you're doing.

I don't have it all together. I don't know everything. But I have chosen to wait. And when the time is right I'll know. I want there to be a purpose behind any relationship like that in my life. You know? That doesn't mean that I sit in a glass box, it actually gives me freedom to talk and be friends. And it's not miserable, it is purposeful. I want a heart that's not torn. A full and clean heart. Where is the safest place for it? In the hands of God. So that is where it stays.

If yours is already torn, save what you have left. It's never too late to save your heart. Jesus never runs out of second chances.

The Adventure to Africa

2011-12-02T10:43:00.000-05:00

I'm home! How can I possibly sum up two incredible weeks in one blog post? I can't. I will probably post about the trip several times in the future.
It really has been a hard but yet wonderfully blessed journey. It was incredible to step off the plane into Africa again. The memories just flooded in as we made our way into the depth of Ethiopia a few days after arriving. We arrived in Alaba Kulito after a 6 hour drive from Addis to a wonderful, welcoming family. Ministry began hard two Sundays ago. It was a rocky start as Kandace got a stomach bug the first Saturday night. I can tell you that we really had to rely on the Lord and He was faithful. She was better within 12 hours and recovered from the weakness within of few days.

The villages we visited were amazing. It left me speechless by the joy of the people. The poverty level there is about as low as you can imagine and it was an honor to be able to share the Gospel with the "outermost parts of the earth." And that it was. Kandace, I and a girl named Abigail Jacobs taught the children in nine of these villages. I had such joy to tell them that they are loved by Jesus. They soaked it in and made every bumpy mile to those places worth it.

The people were so caring and loving. The host family fixed us three meals a day. It was Ethiopian food so we had some struggle adjusting, but they even fixed us popcorn and homemade french fries to give us a taste of home.

My Dad taught in the main church in Alaba. It has over 2,000 members and is what they call the "Mother Church." The village churches are offshoots from this one. Dad had a blessing teaching the many men who sacrificed to come miles from home and sleep on the church floor so they could here the Word of the Lord.

The children absolutely stole my heart. They couldn't be anymore precious.

Obviously, the main goal of the trip was to spread the Gospel, but it was also to encourage the churches there. When they see us come from 7,000 miles away to help, they are encouraged. It has nothing to do with the rich helping the poor, or Americans helping Africans, it is all about Christians supporting Christians. I told the children at every village as they stared at out white skin or rubbed my hand to see if the white would come off, that color doesn't matter. We are all children of God if we are saved by Jesus. It means nothing what color our skin is. Neither is better than the other.

Like always, toward the end of the trip I was ready for home and a bath! The Lord taught me MUCH patience. Right when I thought, "I can't go any further... I'm so tried." God boosted my strength. It is a hard trip. I will admit it. There are no showers in Alaba, no toilets, and no American food. You are plunged into another world. It literally looks like 2,000 years ago. It isn't easy, but the Joy of the Lord is so great that many Christians have no idea how it feels to feel Jesus that way. These people are warriors for Christ. Muslims are predominant. Over 95% of the people in Alaba are Muslims. Every morning a Muslim chant is sounded over loud speakers throughout the surrounding area. It is one of the saddest and eeriest sounds I've ever heard.

I was very ready to get home after a 20 hour plane ride and bed bugs which had somehow made their way into clothes (I was thankful for new clothes in the Addis airport!). But once again the Lord stretched me as we stood on the plane in Atlanta waiting to get off. We had 57 minutes till our next plane took off for RDU. We still had to go through immigration, baggage, customs and then find the terminal! I nearly had a nervous breakdown. We were so close to home and yet we could miss our flight! But God is SO GOOD. We zoomed through immigration, and customs, we slung our luggage off the belt and ran, I mean RAN through the airport on wobbly legs. It was like on Home Alone when the family was trying to get to their plane. People may have thought we were nuts, but hey, WE MADE IT! It was an exciting ending to the day.

Home had never been so sweet. I almost kissed the floor. No matter how great a trip is, there is no place like home. The Lord did amazing things. He really stretched our family through this and made us stronger, He blessed the church in Ethiopia and allowed many to hear about Him all over Alaba. I say that is a pretty good trip. I'm so thankful for our awesome team of the magnificent 7... Dad, Kandace, Cindi Jacobs, Abigail Jacobs, Jason Hatley, Dale Jennings and me. What a great group.

It is beyond wonderful to know that the Lord is pleased. There is NOTHING like mission work, especially when it is in the "outermost parts." All of us as children of God are missionaries, we are called to this. It was an honor. It is an honor. Jesus be praised. We are nothing, but He is everything! Amen!

A Mom of Noble Character, Who Can Find?

2011-11-25T06:00:00.002-05:00

Today is my wonderful Mother, Pam Brown's Birthday! Today I'm in Ethiopia, but truth is that I'm writing this before I go to Ethiopia and have set this to post on my Mom's birthday! But regardless of when I posted this, I love my mom and she is completely wonderful. She has allowed her husband and two teenage daughters to leave for two weeks and miss Thanksgiving and her birthday. My mom is so unselfish. Many women would NEVER let their families do that for the Lord. They would want what THEY want. But not my Mom. I know most children say that their mom is great, but I'm not kidding. She has sacrificed and given more than any woman I know. She has taught me at home for years, has encouraged me, loved me, and given constantly. She doesn't take hardly any "me time," because she says that it is not about "her" but about God. Isn't she just amazing? If I can be half the mom and wife she is, I'll be doing good. I love you mom. I'm sorry we're missing your Birthday, but the Lord is going to bless you for letting us go. Thank you for everything!! I can't wait to hug you when I get home!

My Mom and Andrew

Africa, Here I Come!

2011-11-15T20:09:00.002-05:00

After months of praying, weeks of preparing, and days of packing. My Dad, my sister and I are leaving for Ethiopia tomorrow morning! This whole process has been a roller coaster in my mind. But I am finally ready. I'm actually excited. I'm not just saying that, I really am. I'm also anxious, but I know that the Lord is sovereign and He is my Father. He'll take care of me. Paul said that to "live is Christ and to die is gain." So to live is great and to die is even better. Now, I'm not hoping or planning on dying!! But still, God is my Shepherd.

I still can't believe tomorrow is the day. People ask and wonder, "why are you doing this?" They may even think it is neat, but they still don't get it. Maybe you don't. Well, here is my answer for why I go to a dirty, poor and somewhat dangerous country for two weeks. I go because of LOVE. Jesus loved me and so I love others. Sure, you can love by sending a check, but when those people see you in the "mess" it leaves them speechless. They see, feel and hear the Love of Jesus when you go to them. Mission work is not an option, it is a command and not just to those missionaries you support, but to YOU and ME as well. So I am honored to tell hundreds of people in a faraway country that they are loved.

It will bless them, but this trip will bless us. It is great to serve others at home, but something about going to places where you don't get a shower for nine days and where there are Muslims around, make you stronger and more thankful. Those people really need to know that others are partnering with them. It isn't about Americans helping Ethiopians, because that sounds like rich helping poor. No, it is Christians helping Christians. They are not some "project," but brothers and sisters in Christ who need help sharing the Gospel in the surrounding areas.

I'm honored and blessed. I am, however, going to miss everyone! I pray that you have a wonderful Thanksgiving. Be thankful always not just on that day. I love you all and will see you again on December 1st! I'm sure I'll have a boatload of stories to tell!!

I'll Soar

2011-11-11T12:00:00.002-05:00

Ever had a verse that just follows you around? Well, I have and it has been Isaiah 40:30-31:

³⁰Even youths shall faint and be weary,
and young men shall fall exhausted;
³¹but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings like eagles;
they shall run and not be weary;
they shall walk and not faint.

It's been around a lot lately. I keep thinking about it. And it's like God has given it to me as a gift. One of comfort. I keep seeing "The Lord shall renew their strength." Sometimes I feel that my strength is nearly worn out. Kind of like when you're doing push-ups or sit-ups and you start to quake. Your muscles are so tired and they just want to stop. But when they get like that, you know one thing... they're getting stronger. But at the moment they feel weak, and all you know is that it hurts.

That is how life is sometimes as a Christian. You get tired. According to those verses everyone gets worn down. But God promises to renew our strength, with one condition.... that we "wait on Him." We have to put our trust in Him. Many Christians want God to renew them, but they don't want to have to show any faith or trust. It is critical that we trust in Him. And then my favorite part is about soaring on wings like eagles. I was always the kid that wanted to fly, I dreamed about it, watched Peter Pan all the time and loved planes the moment I stepped on one. I love it because it feels so free. That is what we will feel like when we put our trust in our Father and let Him restore us. The burdens will be laid at His feet and we'll be so light that we can soar.

I love the song "Stronger" by Mandisa. The chorus goes:

When the waves are taking you under
Hold on just a little bit longer
He knows that this is gonna make you stronger, stronger
The pain ain't gonna last forever
And things can only get better
Believe me
This is gonna make you stronger

So, when it is hard, use it for His glory and remember that God never leaves His children behind. He is making us stronger.

Speaking of being strong, today we are celebrating strong men and women who have served this country.... Veterans!! So, I'd like to take this time to say, "Happy Veteran's Day!" I can't thank enough the many people who have given their lives to serving this country. Thank you all, past, present and future!

Letting Go

2011-10-31T15:41:00.001-04:00

I am a control freak. I just am and it is wrong. I always want to know what is going to happen, when it will happen, where it will happen, and why it will happen. And I have to know everything that will happen. Yes, I sound like a joy don't I? Not so much sometimes.

But my life just doesn't always happen like that. In fact, no one's life is like that, especially if you are Christian. You just never know what will happen. It makes my heart pound and my hands get sweaty and Satan whispers in my ear, "Everything's going to fall apart. You don't know what's going on and I know that things are just going to crumble. Look how bad everything looks. It's so bad." And sometimes... I believe him.

My Dad, Kandace (my 13 year old sister) and I are leaving for Ethiopia in two weeks from this Wednesday. Two weeks. I went two years ago this past May and it was awesome, but crazy hard at the same time. I've told everyone how hard and how amazing it was. But lately I've just been thinking about the hard parts and thinking... holy cow, I've actually chosen to do that again?? And then there are all the preparations. Lesson plans and lesson plans and... lesson plans.

And then, I think about how many of my best friends are leaving. They are either leaving the county or the state. Some permanently and some not. I think about me and how I'm left in the dust. It makes me irritated.

I was thinking about how God just must not really notice these problems in my heart and how I'm doing all this alone, or so it seems and how I didn't think that this or that could ever be possible, because apparently I'm at this alone. All of that I knew was false, but I was still thinking it, just the same.

I was reading in Jeremiah 32 half-heartedly. Not really paying attention when I read in verse 26, "Then the word of the Lord came to Jeremiah: 'I am the Lord, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?'" I stopped. What? "Is anything too hard for me, Katy? Have you forgotten that I am GOD? Every detail of your life is laid out before me. I know what I'm doing. Now, what isn't my fault is your attitude." Ding, hello! Katy, wake up! That moment God said... NOTHING IS TOO HARD FOR ME. Not your life, not family or friends or school or even.... Ethiopia.

I went to see what was going on with Jeremiah and why God said that to him. Jeremiah was told by God to buy a field in the Land of Canaan. The Babylonians were taking over and Jeremiah didn't understand why God was asking him to do such a thing. The story really had little to do with me, but not the one part that stopped me cold. I remembered that Jeremiah was called the "Weeping Prophet," because after 70 years of preaching the word of the Lord, he still had no converts. Talk about feeling like you're living a pointless life! When I had looked back I saw that before God had said that to him, Jeremiah had said to the Lord in his prayer, "Lord there is nothing to hard for you." Jeremiah, just like me, knew the truth, but it was having a hard time making it from his head to his heart. I still don't understand everything and I can easily let Satan's demonic forces whisper in my ear, but I know the truth. I know the Truth and the truth sets me free.

We can't dispute God's will, but we can seek to learn what it means. For me, I just have to let go. Of people I love, the truth about places I'm going, of friends who leave and I have to let go of my life. It isn't mine anyways. Easier said than done. But I have to keep trying.

When the President Comes to Town

2011-10-17T23:08:00.001-04:00

Today President Obama visited the high school a mile and a half from my house. He taxied right down the road that I've ridden all of my life. I didn't go see him at the school, but I watched him live on TV. Earlier today I road by West High and it was covered in people. The tickets to see him were sold out before I even knew about them. News reporters, the secret service with their cool shades, and police scrambled around. Cars covered every inch of space that people didn't. And then late this afternoon, he arrived. The President of the U.S. arrived in our little town. People were thrilled. Even those who don't agree with his policies couldn't help but be in awe that the most powerful man on the planet was in Millers Creek, NC. Days before his arrival, secret services checked and searched all the premises of West Wilkes High school. Everything and everyone had to be just right. The President was guarded at all times. Everything was put in order and then re-put in order... because it was the President and it had to be perfect.

It got me thinking about how much work went in to protecting a man with a title. A man. People clamored and fell all over themselves just for a picture of him and just, maybe to shake his hand.

One day we will see Jesus seated on His throne and the feeling of awe that many felt of the President in their midst will be nothing compared to the God Man before them. The King of everything. The Ruler of all things. More powerful than any President or Leader and more important than any man. Jesus is more than a leader. He is more than a man. He did more than lead a nation. He was killed. And then he rose from the dead. He lowered Himself to nothing, so that we might be saved. I don't believe that we will be able to stand before Him, but that we will bow. In fact, everyone will bow. All Presidents past and future, all Emperors and Leaders and Kings will fall to their knees and say "Holy, holy, holy." No matter what religion, they will one day call Jesus "Lord." But not all will get to live with Him forever. The ticket to Heaven is Him saving you by you calling on His name. And there is still time to get one.

For Jesus, there will be no body guards. No one can hurt Him. He will call us by name. I believe that He will hug us and tell us that He loves us. Jesus will. Not some man who got elected to lead a nation. Not a movie star. Not a famous athlete. But Jesus who died and rose again and took our sins. He will. The President of everything will. Now, that is something to get excited about.

The Past's Bridge to the Future

2011-10-05T14:18:00.000-04:00

I watched the Living Waters documentary a couple days ago called "180." It was unbelievable. The documentary started out with Ray Comfort just asking people off the street if they knew who Adolf Hitler was... less than 10% did. From there Ray Comfort asked the people if they thought the Holocaust was a good or bad thing. Most said that it was bad. Later he asked them about abortion and many saw no problem with it. He compared it to the Holocaust and completely blew their minds when talking about something many consider no big deal compared to something many consider so terrible. But he showed them that they are really both terrible and very much alike. It was a completely amazing 33 minutes. I recommend you watch it. I do, however, suggest that children under the age of 12 or so not watch it as there are a few video clips and gruesome pictures of the Holocaust.

That documentary also helped me see just how clueless we are a a nation. We don't even know who Adolf Hitler was. Get this, 45% of 17 year-olds can't place the Civil War within half a century of when it took place. About half of highschoolers think that Columbus sailed to America after 1750. 20% of 17-year-olds don't know which country we were fighting against in WW2. People don't know and have never been taught.... or at least taught so that they will remember. History has fallen through the cracks. I used not care much about history until I saw how vital it is to know what has happened in the past. There is the saying that those who do not know history are doomed to repeat it. I believe that is the case for this nation. Those who move away from God always fall apart and we have been doing so for a long time, but within the last 50 years, more than ever. Thankfully, my parents have instilled in me a desire to know history. I find that many young teens and children don't care about the our nation's past. They don't care about what is happening in the world around them and they couldn't care less about politics. Well, I have some news.... We are the next generation... and we are clueless. My generation in general (not all) don't know or care and the parents don't tell us what we need to know. It is going to show in about 30 years how much we've lost.

We need to be informed. Not infatuated, but informed as to what is going on around us. As each generation keeps dropping the ball, it is only going to get worse. The U.S. is one of the most failing countries in passing history to their children.

History can be so interesting, but we often clump it in with every other subject in school and think that it is just a bunch of stories. What a sad reality. The truth is, the past is the guide to the future. We need to look back to look ahead.

But all that to say... you really need to watch "180" if you are older than about 12. It is amazing. It isn't about needing to know history as much as what I've just talked about but more about the importance of human life, in the womb and out.

Check it out at, http://www.180movie.com/.

In the Sand

2011-09-26T15:18:00.000-04:00

I just got back from vacation. It was wonderful and so nice and refreshing to spend time at the ocean and doing nothing, but eat, get battered by waves, laugh, and play Rook. It was glorious.

The last day we were there I was playing in the sand. I was digging a deep hole because I had nothing better to do. I was digging in the wettest part of the sand. The water was almost up to where I was digging. I just kept digging there. Once the hole was deep, I made a gully that would bring the water to the hole. I packed the sand so that it wouldn't be easily destroyed. It was perfect. Suddenly the water washed over it and some sand broke off and fell into to hole. No big deal, I just pulled the sand out and repaired the damage. But in less than 30 seconds it had happened again and my gully fell in. As I worked to repair it, water destroyed the hole. I kept trying to repair the hole and gully even though the water kept destroyed them. I got up and went to help Clara do something and when I came back the hole and gully were completely gone. I realized that trying to rebuild it there was a waste of time simply because the water would keep ruining it.

That experience reminded me of life. Sometimes we as people keep trying to build up our lives of our own accord in the wrong place. It is easy to build it where the sand is soft and moldable. When the water took it down, I didn't try to move up the beach away from the water but I kept letting the water knock it down. I was digging in the wrong place, because it was easy.

Satan often saturates parts of our lives, making it look easy and enjoyable to work there. But when we start working there it keeps being destroyed because we are in "Satan's territory." The water kept destroying everything I did. All I needed to do was move away from the water. The dry sand was harder to use and took more work to build, but it didn't get washed away.

In life we often wonder why everything is falling apart, why it is so hard to "be good." It is because we are trying to live where Satan has persuaded us that it is best and then he keeps destroying where we are. We just need to move away from him.

Jesus waits to build our lives the way HE wants. It
is always best and it is solid there. More solid than sand. As solid as a rock.

Jesus said, "Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock." (Matthew 7:24-25 ESV)

It's worth letting Jesus build up our lives where He wants them and in His way. It's never too late to let Him have your life. Not just as Savior, but as Lord. He knows the plans He has for us, they are plans that are to prosper us and not to harm us, plans to give us hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11). Hallelujah!

Do Everything

2011-09-16T18:55:00.000-04:00

I've started to blog several times this week and a few times today, but I am at that point again where I have so much to say that I can't pick something. I'm not going to write a post that tries to include every idea because that is just... annoying. I have done that before though!

What should I blog about? Well, I'm looking straight ahead at the calender on my wall. I can't believe that today is already the 16th of September. Of September!! Isn't that crazy? Time flies. I feel like I just got back from camp in July... but in a way it does feel like it has been a few months. Life is just so short. We all know that. I've even blogged about the shortness of life before. It is just short. Even if you live to be 100, compared to the earth's 6,000 or so years, it is short. And compared to eternity it is VERY short. So now I'm thinking about how much time I waste. God really has given us all one life. One chance to use it for Him. Often I just use it on myself. I am too thickheaded to realize that if I live for Him that He will reward me in Heaven. Humans automatically gravitate to the path of least resistance. We do what feels nice and is most comfortable, thinking, "We only have one life! Better live it up!" But "living it up" for ourselves is really pointless.

Everything we do should be for God's glory. The boring, the exciting, the... everything. It reminds me of Steven Curtis Chapman's song "Do Everything." I LOVE that song. It's happy and upbeat and lightens my day. The chorus goes:

Do everything you do to the glory of the One who made you
Cause He made you to do
Every little thing that you do to bring a smile to His face
And tell the story of grace
With every move that you make
And every little thing you do

Listen to the whole song by clicking Do Everything.

Wow... I got all of that out of looking at my calendar. I should try to do blogs more often by just looking at objects in my room and talking about them!

Enjoy this cool day, and if where you live is not as freezing as it feels here today in N.C.... well, enjoy this warm day!

More Than Just Saying

2011-09-07T11:25:00.007-04:00

I can't believe that I'm blogging right now. I have an exam at 3:00 and should be studying, but the more I study the more nervous I get. So, I'm going to talk and think about someone that I want to think about... God. I've not blogged in eight days anyway so I need to get on here.

Well, I was watching a video of Francis Chan (author of two amazing books, Crazy Love and Forgotten God) last night (when I should have been studying ;)). He was talking on the simple topic of "following Jesus." He was talking about how in the church we "follow" differently than we would anywhere else in the world. As a kid it was easy. We played "follow the leader." It was simple, you just did exactly as the leader did. Well, now in the church we've come to this point where we often say, even if we don't out loud, "I'm following Him in my heart." What if a kid was sitting by the side and said, "Yeah, I know it looks like I'm not following, but I'm following in my heart." Francis said that we wouldn't tell a child of ours to go clean their room and allow them to come back and say, "Hey! I memorized what you told me to do. You said, 'go clean your room.' Oh and by the way mom/dad, my friends and I are going to have a study every week on what it would look like if we cleaned our rooms!" That would be absurd. The parent just wants to kid to DO IT. It's great to memorize it and talk about it, but it is most important that they do it.

Aren't we like that as believers? We talk about serving and following Jesus. We tell people that we follow Jesus. But then when people look at the "room" (our lives), they see a contradiction to what we say. Jesus said in Matthew 15:8-9, “‘These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. They worship me in vain; their teachings are merely human rules.’" It's easy to talk, but it is hard to live that talk. Christianity is hard. Not the watered down Americanized version, but early Church Christianity is hard. The American version is "going to church," the early Church version is "being the church." I believe that some churches are starting to see that following Jesus is more than singing a few songs on Sunday and listening to the preacher preach for 40 minutes. Being a Christian means everything we do is to bring honor to Jesus... Monday through Sunday.

I love what Chip Ingram once said, "If you are really born again, then nothing should have to prod you to act like a believer. You can tell if you're really "saved" by whether His commands are burdensome."

Following Jesus is not that complicated. I'll use the Nike logo:

Before The Throne

2011-08-30T11:55:00.004-04:00

Last night I went to a Monday night Bible Study that I've been going to lately with some different people from Mt. Pleasant. It is such a wonderful group. Most of us happen to be in our late teens and 20s. It is so awesome being the youngest one there and look up to those honest believers. They aren't perfect. In fact, it is just a group of sinners. Mixed from a vast array of backgrounds. But we come together with one thing in common, a love for our Savior.

Yesterday we were talking about prayer. Prayer. That word is used so much that sometimes I just overlook what it even means. The prayer that we were talking about is not flowery prayer, but intense prayer before the throne of God. The prayer that is the sword against spiritual warfare. The kind of prayer that honestly, we probably don't do often. But those are the prayers that terrify Satan and his demons. Why? Because they are what bring about amazing things among God's children. But I was sitting there thinking how hard it is to pray like that. My mind wanders and if it is early morning I'll be praying... and then all of a sudden, well... zzzzz. Yeah. That kind of prayer is hard. Really hard. That is when I realized that maybe it should be. How many churches have you attended where the people pray? I mean intensely, on their faces before God. What's wrong with most Christians and churches is that we really don't pray. We may ramble on some list and pray passingly for Aunt Betty, Grandma and Mom as we are half dosing. In church we pray before the sermon or after. The preacher says something that sounds really nice and we usually don't listen to most of it and come up out of habit on the "amen." Now, there is nothing wrong with lists or pretty prayers. And I'm not saying that we're falling asleep in prayers all the time. But isn't it easy to pray like that or see praying as nothing more than a list to read off or something pretty to say? Not always, but sometimes it is for me.

What we need to see is that we have access to come before the throne of God and talk to Him as a Father. If we could see what intense, Spirit-guided prayers do to the spiritual warfare around us then maybe we would see it as what it is... AMAZING. We aren't talking to the ceiling, but to God. We shouldn't ask for things constantly, but nor should we be afraid to ask our Father for blessings. He wants us to talk to Him like His children, but also in total honor and respect.

The thing about prayer is that it isn't easy. But we have to remember that Satan wants to do one thing more than anything... keep us from talking to his enemy. If we don't fellowship with God, then he knows that we will not be likely to notice when or what He wants us to do. Dear friends, it hit me last night that if we would truly pray, that our lives would change. Our churches would change. And more in our nation would see the wrong road we're walking down. God has so much to show us, but we are often satisfied with how things are. Let's go before the throne of God. He is waiting.

Earthquake

2011-08-23T23:25:00.000-04:00

People in Washington D.C. evacuated from buildings

I probably wasn't the only one who felt like I was in a boat in rough seas for about a minute this afternoon. It was a crazy feeling. Everything was bouncing off my desk and the whole room literally groaned. For one moment I thought that is was very unsafe to be inside. I yelled through the house that whatever was going on needed to stop because it had to be bad for the house!

I later found out that it was not a truck or an out of balance washing machine, but an earthquake. Thousands of people from Georgia all the way to New York had felt Virginia's earthquake. It was very close to Washington D.C. (which I thought was kind of... interesting). But I honestly thought that the East isn't supposed to have that magnitude of an earthquake! If I wanted that we could move to California! But once I began to think back about that few moments of the earthquake, I realized how completely powerless I was to what was going on. The roof could have fallen on my head! It made me realize how little I am. I may think I'm in control of this or that but God controls nature. He is so powerful. I am so small.

It made me think that that is how it is going to be after the Rapture... only a hundred times worse. The news said that cell phone carriers got completely bogged down and that people closer to where it happened were running outside in terror. The whole world will be like that during the seven years of the Tribulation.

God has the power to do anything. Just that minute or so of shaking in my room left me in awe of our Creator. How great He is.

God Owes Me... Nothing

2011-08-21T19:48:00.001-04:00

I was thinking about how much I expect from God. How I ask Him for things and think that since I try to live for Him that somehow He owes me. That I deserve it. Deep down I know that I am a sinner and that He doesn't owe me anything, but often I just don't think about that. Have you thought that if God didn't love us that He would still be worthy of our praise? If He had never done anything for us, He would still deserve our respect and honor simply because He made us and He hasn't wiped us off the map for our sins. As simple as it may seem... God didn't owe us His Son. Jesus didn't have to die for us. God doesn't have to take care of us, nor love us, or protect us. But He does.

I don't deserve anything. If I were killed tomorrow because I am Jesus' follower, I still wouldn't have earned God love. There is nothing we can do on this earth that will ever have "earned" us even a small blessing from God. It leaves my mind boggled to think that He is right and just, but He is also love. He chose to reach down from the glorious glories and live among us to die for us. Not only did He do that, but He now takes care of us!

My Dad made a point today in church that staggered my mind. "How many times do we say that we are going to give Jesus our everything and then we hold back?" That doesn't seem too profound, but it hit me hard. Because of this loving Savior's love I constantly tell Jesus, "I love you with ALL of my heart! I am yours. Everything I am and have is yours. I'll do whatever you want, Lord." But after that comment I rewinded in my mind and remembered all the times I had said that and then totally "fallen off the wagon." I said it and then I just didn't do it. It was dishonest. I am like Ananias and Sapphira when they said that they gave all they made off of the land they sold to the church, but they really only gave a portion. I say, "I'll give you everything," but then I whine about something that is so little. I am willing to go to Ethiopia, but am I willing just to hold my tongue when someone is rude? Those "little things" show our true love for the One who loved us and didn't have to.

The greatest blessing any human could get in front of us... the undeserved love of the only God and King. We must live with ALL of our hearts for Him. Easier said than done? Jesus said, "be perfect for I am perfect." We will never be perfect, but we can try. We can't use that as an excuse. And then, we must share the Love of God with those around us. Because it is a miracle.

Visit my friend, Jason's blog. He just posted an awesome post about sharing Jesus' love. It is well worth reading and is from someone who truly strives to live a life that honors God. Just click here.

Thank the Lord, He reached out for us!

Just a Chat

2011-08-12T09:50:00.000-04:00

I haven't blogged in 10 days... and there is no excuse. I just haven't. Honestly, I've not wanted to waste your time with a boring and useless post, but I appear to be doing that now! Oh well, I have decided that my posts are usually "heavy" so I will just talk to you without a topic to bring me here this time.

Well, it feels awkward now (like how it feels when you see someone you haven't seen in a long time and after formalities you just stare at each other). Well, I'll tell you something personal to break the ice. Are you ready? I've felt OLD lately. For Pete's sake, I am four days in to being a senior in high school (homeschool). And I just feel completely OLD. Now, I know some may say... "Oh, child! I'm 97, you're not old! I'm old." Well, that is true. No! I am kidding! Really! But honestly, I finally feel... old. It makes me sad and happy. I'm not saying that 17 years old means anything, but for example, I feel like how you feel when you have been enjoying yourself doing some relaxing activity and you look at a clock and see that you have passed hours and it felt like minutes! I just feel like I've past so much wonderful time. But with that said, I still sleep with a baby blanket. Whoa! You didn't except that! Actually, I use it to prop my head up and it happens to be the softest one, so I use it. Kandace says, "Yeah, right." Maybe I'll get through this feeling old phase as I get older. That was like a pun or something. Ha ha!

I hear Dad practicing his sermon as I sit here. I love it when I hear him talking to the walls downstairs. It sounds like this week's sermon is going to be good. Ahh. I love it.

I must say to end this completely awkward blog post, that my life is wonderful. Not because of anything I'm doing or because of anything that is happening around me. My life is wonderful because I have been saved from a miserable existence. I'm really rescued. I live as a blessed slave to the ONLY God. The Creator whom even if He hadn't bought me at a price, would still deserve my life. But He actually loves me. He calls me His child. So, my life is splendid. No matter how old I get, I am a child. A child of the King. So I choose to live for Him. I try (but fail often) to love what He loves (what is righteous) and hate what He hates (sin). Because He loved me enough to die for me... I want to love Him enough to die to myself.

Friend, thanks for reading. Know one thing, before you go. You are loved.

Now, go find something better to do with your time.

Missing Lines

2011-08-01T12:39:00.002-04:00

I went to a concert with the Annie Moses Band performing last night in Greensboro, N.C. It was wonderful, as always. They performed a song that I has heard them do many times, but it gave new meaning to me this time. They wrote it and it was the idea of Benjamin Wolaver. Benjamin had spoken at devotion during FASA (Fine Arts Summer Academy) about the problem of "missing lines" in Christian's morality. The song went right along with that idea. Here are the lyrics to the chorus and second verse of the song "Blush":

When hands were gentle and words were kind
And love could wait a long, long time
And private matters held their hush
And grooms were gallant and brides would blush

Does it seem a silly dream played back in black and white?
Pearls and gloves and hymns of love

The lines of wrong and right

Well let's hush the cynic for just a minute
And let the dreamers dare
To dream of love that never fails
Oh won't you take me there

So it left me thinking about the "lines" of wrong and right. What if things were where they belonged? Now, matters that don't belong in the open are just spouted out. Even in the few short years since I was little, things have changed so much. It seemed more acceptable to be innocent then. These days even what some consider "cute" TV shows are brash and display lewd talk. The lines of childhood and what belongs there are blurred.

The big thing for me is relationships between young ladies and young men. The lines have nearly been washed away in this aspect. I've blogged about dating before but, this whole topic has resurrected my thoughts on it. Everything is so flashy and tacky and absolutely loose that is leaves me a little dizzy these days. I love the line in the song, "When love could wait a long, long time." When love waits it is strongest, mark my words. But waiting seems hard. Actually, it isn't as hard as imagined. It is actually enjoyable and peaceful to wait on that love for God's timing. But see, the lines has been broken for so many young people. And many are happy just to push the lines a little, just to have some "fun." But it is dangerous.

Lines are good. When certain things are reserved for certain things, each area is defined. The world says to break lines, that you are more free if you do. Well, have you ever seen a picture that a three year-old has colored in a coloring book? The lines are there but the child has simply ignored them. You can't tell what color belongs to what part of the picture. Every color is everywhere and it leaves a messy blur. That is what happens when we ignore the lines in life. God has placed boundaries that are revealed in His Word that are meant to be acknowledged and kept. It is for our own good.

Annie Dupre made a comment, "What if these ideas aren't old and outdated but really are the ways of Christ followers?"

Fine Arts Summer Academy 2011

2011-07-25T14:55:00.000-04:00

The past two weeks have been a marathon. My family has been in Nashville, Tenn at the Annie Moses Band Fine Arts Summer Academy. It has been a packed two weeks of music and for me, acting. I loved it! There is no place like the stage! But as much as I love the stage, it is most important that I am there to bring glory to Jesus and use my gifts for Him. That is what FASA is all about. It was wonderful to catch up with old friends and make music and act like we'd never been apart.

This video sums up the whole camp. It is one of the final songs from the Final Gala at the end of the two weeks. It is amazing. If you don't have time to watch the whole thing, fast forward up to 5:10. Keep in mind that all the music (about 50 pieces in the whole show) were learned in only the time we were there at camp.

Half of the orchestra (it was so large that the other half played in the second half of the show).

Singing in a bluegrass band.

Kandace (on the far right) singing in a bluegrass band.

FASA is intense and hard work, but is worth every moment of rehearsal and practice when we get to the final show and see the bounty of the hard work. It is extraordinary. The Wolaver family (the Annie Moses Band) put it all together. They arrange all of the music, write the show and organize everything months in advance. I'm so thankful for all they do to inspire young people to make His praise glorious!

Time flew by and now I'm home, but rejuvenated again. I've learned and been stretched all to do more for the Kingdom of God. What a blessing!

Home

2011-07-07T12:14:00.003-04:00

I don't usually post about my home life. And I honestly wasn't even going to post today, but I thought that I would tell you about my home.

It is the most beautiful place in the world (with the exception of a few Hawaiian beaches that are probably nicer... :)). The air smells of sweet honey-suckle and mountain air in the summer. Right now the grass is lush and everything is green. My home sets on a hill where there is a perfect view of the Blue Ridge Mountains.

We have a large garden of red earth that produces more beans and tomatoes than we could ever eat. And I perspire more than should be allowed picking its bounty.

Sometimes if I listen closely as I am in the garden I can hear the rushing creek in the woods and a whippoorwill calling out.

In late June and early July we pick blackberries. June bugs buzz in the green leaves and we pick the juicy berries.

My dear piano.

A day doesn't pass that I don't sit at the piano and play those ivory keys. There is nothing except God's Word that brings me such peace. I love the guitar and the viola, but the piano floats me away and I love it (especially when it is tuned).

The inside of my home is more precious than it's beautiful surroundings. It is a place of love and peace. The sound of Daddy's deep voice or fast little feet in the hall. The aroma of hot chocolate in the winter and summer salad in the summer. The Waltons are on at 8:00pm and popcorn soon after. Devotions on the worn out couch and the goodnight kiss before bed. My creaking stairs up to my attic room and the quietness of a restful night.

I couldn't ask for a better home. I love the place I live, but I love the people that I share it with more. My three best friends are also my siblings and are not perfect as I am not perfect, but they are my family and I love them. At some point it became unpopular to like your family, but we don't care. A family loves when you're not perfect, helps when it's inconvenient, praises another, and just cares because they should.

That is my home. That is my family. And I'm thankful for everything on my little hill I call home. And mostly because God's presence is here.

Population Me

2011-06-30T10:55:00.003-04:00

We see it everywhere. Be happy! Go relax! Make yourself comfortable. Take a break. Enjoy yourself. From vacations to tooth paste and from clothes to restaurant food. We're told, "Baby, it is all about YOU!" You are what matters. Make your life as easy as possible.

So, should I be living for me? Should we be living for ourselves? I'm surrounded in a culture that is telling me how to live to make myself happy. I've been wondering what kind of "happy" that is. I can't help but look around and see a world and culture that is trying to please themselves. That lifestyle has slowly seeped into the Church and Christian's lives as well. I've noticed a form of Christianity where the goal seems to get things out of church and God without having to give much. It is a "Christian version" of the world's agenda. What happened to the early Church's lifestyle? What happened to being willing to go into dangerous situations because someone might accept Jesus because of it. I don't mean doing foolish things, but I do mean not being afraid of serving the Lord in mission work. I hear so often that "it would be too far out of my comfort zone" or "it's just not for me." My friends in Ethiopia and Mexico are willing to live in those treacherous atmospheres just so that other may hear the Truth.

I'm wondering where are the Christians that care more if their waitress knows Jesus than whether their appetizers arrive well before the meal? Where are Christians who care if other's needs are met before their own? If we would remember that as God's children, it is not our jobs to make sure that we are satisfied and comfortable. We were not created by God so that He could make us happy every minute of the day. Max Lucado once put it, "We do not exist to have God make a big deal out of us, but we exist to make a big deal out of God." We are bond servants to God. We owe Him everything. He saved us and yet we often say, "Thanks, Lord. Now if I could just have....." See, God will give us joy, but the only true joy is found in serving Him. Yes, serving.

My point? As children of God, we are here on earth for His glory, not our own. Gives us all something to think about, doesn't it?

Here's a few verses... they're short... don't skip over them.

Everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made. Isaiah 43:7

For you were bought with a price.So glorify God in your body. 1 Corinthians 6:20

So, that has been what I've been thinking about lately. If you're reading this, you have survived another rambling of my mind (also called a blog post). Congratulations!

Back from Mexico!

2011-06-20T13:20:00.001-04:00

Where to begin? There are no words that I could possibly post that would adequately describe how unbelievable the Mexico/Texas mission trip was. I could talk about it all day and still come up short. I think I've finally realized that it is impossible to really explain and describe something that God does. But with that said, I'm still going to try.

The church in Progresso that our team put the roof on and helped build.

The men worked all week on this church. They put on the roof in unbelievable wind. It was dangerous and extremely hot. But they worked for hours to get the work done.

A packed VBS in Mexico!

The nights we went to VBS in Mexico were wonderful. One night we had 144, not including our team of 36! The Lord did amazing things and we got to meet and spend time with some of the sweetest children.

Miriam and Pastor Oscar's baby shower.

The baby shower was so beautiful. The team used our own money to by the gifts. Sweet Miriam was shocked and so thankful. Their first daughter didn't live from a stiffness disease. We had the opportunity to pray around them for the health of their son. The presence of the Holy Spirit was as strong as I've ever felt it. The voice of God's people crying out to Him was powerful.

My little friend, Amalia.

I became close friends with a sweet little girl named Amalia. She couldn't speak any English and I couldn't speak but a little Spanish, but we still became so close. She is such a blessing and I'm going to miss her.

VBS in Mexico.

They say that pictures speak a thousand words, but I have a million words. Between the building the church and VBS in Texas and Mexico, there were so many wonderful occurrences. Two people accepted Christ as their Savior and many heard of the love of Jesus and many more got to feel that love.

We were a team of 36 sweaty and dirty people for 8 days, but we got to be ambassadors for the King of Kings. We saw tears in the eyes of hard-hearted, joy on the faces of the broken, hope in the eyes of the burdened and Jesus in the lives of those who were once lost. In Mexico the people aren't "immune" to the Gospel as many are where I live. They are not used to hearing about Jesus and they are amazed that one would love them so much to die for them.

Every moment on every plane, every early morning, every tired moment was worth to see what God did. I'm sad it is over, but then... it really isn't.

One Week Till Mexico!

2011-06-03T14:47:00.002-04:00

I can't believe that it has almost been a year since we went to Mexico! Time flies! Literally. I am even more excited about the trip than I usually am! It's only one week away! This time of year I am reminded of how much I love missions. If you've never been on a mission trip... well, you need to go on one! It is such an honor to tell others about the Savior of the world and how much He loves them. It is one of the most satisfying things I've ever done. We aren't sharing about "another" way to Heaven, but THE way. We get the privilege to share about the ONLY God and His great love. And then there are the bonds that team members make. If you've ever been on a mission trip with someone, by the time you get back, you know more about them than you care to know. There are always some that we never imagined could be that messy or snore that loud! But that is the fun. As Christians we are often too busy living our separate lives and running in our own circles that we only see the "church" side of our fellow believers. But mission trips pull us together out of the ordinary to work for a common goal and we get to know and love one another more than we ever imagined that we could!

It's tight! And the men can't keep it neat.

I'm just so excited! Can you tell? Yes, we'll get up at 4:30 or 5 am everyday and work and teach in the hot sun. Yes, we'll get tired and bunk beds will get old. Yes, two bathrooms for 16 women will seem impossible. But it is stretching and challenging and we grow closer to the Lord.

Mexico is wonderful as you can tell, but going to Ethiopia is even more stretching. Much more. But then it draws me closer to my Savior as I get the honor to share His love. And that is in November!

But meanwhile, we can and should witness here at home. The person I pass in Walmart needs Jesus as much as that child in Texas or Mexico. We can be a light to the world and a light to our family, friends and community too.

But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth. Acts 1:8

Smile! Group photo!

VBS!

Off we go!

Homeschool

2011-05-29T14:33:00.001-04:00

It's the life of peanut butter sandwiches, textbooks on the bed, old clothes for school, outside adventures at all times of the day, one teacher for all grades, the Bible welcome.... homeschool.

I went to the annual North Carolina Homeschool Conference this weekend. I haven't really mentioned much or anything really about homeschooling on my blog. But I can tell you that I love being homeschooled. I can't thank my Mom enough for the solid relationship that she has built between us because she stays home. My Mom and Dad have taught me that they want me to work hard and study and do my best, but more than that, they want me to have a relationship with God and a relationship with my family. Sports, music, grades, etc are not as important... nowhere near as important. They desire for me to work in the church more than stay home to do homework. They've told me to work hard, but at the things that matter most, which will bring glory to God.

EOGs are important, sports are great, friends are good, but God is more important. No wonder kids are leaving the faith; they've been told their whole lives that grades matter most or that dance comes first. God is just a side thing. My parents have shown me in the 11 years I've been in homeschool and really since I was born that things like Biology, Algebra, Writing, History are all great, but should be viewed through a Biblical world-view and come after the family and God. Homeschoolers are often accused of being "brain-washed" since they hear their parents beliefs more than the world's. But my parents have told me what they believe and then left the step of faith in the Word of God up to me. I chose to believe because I wanted to.

I have said all of this to say that I am thankful for parents that have put the priorities in the right order. This weekend has reminded me how blessed I am.

Blinded to the Truth

2011-05-23T21:07:00.001-04:00

Supposedly the world was expected to end Saturday night at 9:00pm Eastern time. Thousands of people sold all they had to be prepared to leave earth. Their beliefs came from an 89 year old man whom predicts the rapture. This was not his first prediction. People truly believed him because of a few Bible verses he used out of context to try to prove his point.

The Bible says in Matthew 24:36: "But concerning that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son." God doesn't want us to guess when He will come, but be prepared always and serve Him meanwhile.

All of this "end of the world" talk made me want to watch the Left Behind movies again. Kandace and I watched them and I was reminded of how much this planet will go through in those seven years of the Tribulation. It will be unbelievable and there will be turmoil that this world has never experienced. The Antichrist will spend the first 3 years or so making peace and things may seem to be doing better as the world will slip into his hands. But it will all turn in the last 3 1/2 years as Satan will literally enter him and reign.

In the first movie, news reporter Buck Williams was invited to the UN meeting by the Antichrist himself. Only because Buck had accepted Christ as His Savior literal minutes earlier was he able to see the truth in the meeting and not be duped. Satan couldn't blind him because He was seeing through the Holy Spirit.

After I watched that I was reminded of how we can be so easily blinded by Satan. Even as Christians, he can blind us to the Truth and tell us our sin is no big deal. He blinded the people who sold all they had and waited on a mountain on Saturday. He tells us lies and without the guidance of the Holy Spirit, we can be lead astray. Our lives can suddenly look like the world and our thoughts can easily be like the world's and our desires can easily mirror the world's.

We as Christians should be careful to not be lead astray by Satan's schemes and live all the days the Lord allows serving Him so that when that day comes we can rise to Him!

A New Book!

2011-05-13T13:42:00.001-04:00

My Dad has written a book, which will be out in less than a two weeks! Looking back on the book's progress, I can say that it has been a long but blessed experience. But it is so good to have it almost done! I know Dad is glad! Here is the front cover....

And the back cover where my wee name is the third one mentioned! :)

The book is wonderful and is about how the church and first and foremost, the family can raise Christ-centered young adults. I can't wait for it to be in our hands!

You can pre-order it on Amazon.com if you... click here.

So excited!!

A Generation With Purpose

2011-05-04T15:20:00.000-04:00

My generation appears to have given itself a bad name. I can't go anywhere without hearing comments about how lazy and rude teenagers are. How we constantly text, watch TV, stay in our rooms, snap at others, listen to bad music, and the list could go on for miles. It is so sad to me. We are considered adolescents that have few manners and mumble to adults. We may have "Christian" on Facebook as our "religion." We may even go to church somewhere. We even mention Jesus sometimes. But we are still considered to behave like the "typical teen."

Switching gears, people ask me often, "what are you going to do with your life." I'm 17 and that must be what people are supposed to ask 17 year-olds. Many that ask have a preconceived notion that I should get a job that makes as much money as possible, live comfortably and save for retirement or something. Many assume I should be wild as a teen, go to college to major in something that will make a ton of money, that will do this so I can do that and this and that and this and yada yada yada. That is how the American "Christian" child should grow up? Right?

I have no problem with a good job and money, but living for that is where the issue arises. Many people grow up planning all along to serve the "world." They really don't even realize they are doing it. They do what everyone does so they can live for the world. The world is oppressive, though. The purpose you have in it is to get a name for yourself, to make something of yourself even if it means losing everything else. You serve the world to get something from it. You spend your life trying to win it's approval. However, the world often tramples on it's citizens. Some suddenly realize that serving the world is without eternal purpose.

This world needs a generation with a lasting purpose behind it. It needs a generation that serves God's kingdom as faithfully as many serve the world's. God's Kingdom, however, is full of joy. You don't come there looking for purpose... it is laid before you by the One that created the Universe. You don't come looking for a name... it is woven into the tapestry of time. You don't come to get anything, but to give, and yet you are given more than you could ever want or need.

Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Teenagers who serve God's Kingdom look differently from the "typical teen." They live with a purpose in the depths of their hearts that is greater than money or popularity. They live without the desire to hide that they are a follower of the Most High. They shock adults with their attitudes that are so unlike the world's. They love those that others don't. Money is not the desire of their hearts. They live to serve the One that served them in the greatest way.

We need a generation that would be willing to put down the rectangle gods (screens of TVs, ipods, cell phones, etc) and serve. We need a generation that has a purpose greater than this world's. It may look strange to the "American dream pursuers." A glimpse of this lasting purpose may be a mom staying home even though she could make lots of money. It could be a 16 year old girl blessing a 5 year old's heart by talking to her for a few minutes. It could be a sweet old lady helping fix a meal for a sick family. It could be a dad who shows tough love. It looks strange to everyone else. But then, that is how it is supposed to look.

God has laid His plans before us. Don't think it is too late to live for something greater than this world. And teenagers, we can prove that we aren't incapable of being strong Christians. We can let God's light shine through our lives by living for Jesus. Not just "saying"... but "living." This world needs to see some Christian young people whose lives aren't watered down by everything under the sun... a generation with purpose.

1 Timothy 4:12
Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.

I couldn't think of a title for this post.

2011-04-30T20:45:00.002-04:00

I know I haven't posted in a while... a whole week! That is a record. I really have missed my blog. I did change the background though. Do you like it? I was hungry when I chose the picture. No kidding.

Well, a lot has been going on. My cousins, Kandace and I sang and played at Chick-fil-A Family Night on Tuesday, and again at a church on Thursday. We have been busy practicing and playing and my fingers are callused from my unforgiving guitar strings. But it really has been a joy!

Taylor and me getting ready to sing at Chick-fil-A. I didn't get a picture of me playing because I was busy... playing.

Last night was the Rite of Passage banquet at Smokehouse. It was so wonderful to see six other young adults celebrating the work they've done and having the desire to serve the Lord by being mature young adults. This world needs children that are raised to be adults with a purpose. A purpose that is so much greater than the "American Dream", but is God's purpose for our lives.

And then here is my favorite 6 year old sister waiting to eat at the banquet! Isn't she cute?!

And then, the garden. Here is a picture of our freshly planted garden. It must produce a harvest... it must! I really am looking forward to it's fresh fruit and vegetables!

Well, that really is all I have. I am working on a brilliant post which will eventually go from my brain to my blog... just not tonight.

Have a lovely Sunday and remember, Jesus loves you so very much. He died for you. He rose again for you. He loves you. Show Him how much you love Him back.

Because He Loved Us

2011-04-23T19:36:00.000-04:00

There is a true story.

There was once a baby boy. He was born 2000 years ago to a poor family. He grew and lived a sinless life. He had come with one purpose. One that He did not have to fulfill, but one that He chose to. One Passover night He slept little. His stomach churned with knowing, knowing what must be done. He prayed in a garden and the pressure was so great... He sweat blood. He was betrayed by a close follower. He was accused. Sentenced an unfair sentence. Laughed at, mocked. Men spit in His face. His holy face. He was led to a post, stripped of His robe and was beaten. Shards of glass and bone ripped His skin. He breathed in ragged breaths. He whispered, "forgive them", and no one knew why. The blood of the Innocent of the innocent flowed. The gathering laughed and yelled. They beat Him longer than they were allowed. He loved them still and said, "forgive them."

The ones He loved threw him to the ground, hit Him and beat Him as they shoved a crown upon His head. A crown of thorns pierced His head as He grit His teeth. A splintered beam of wood was placed on His stripped flesh. He carried the weight of the world on His back as He climbed the hill. His arms shook from exhaustion. His mind was foggy but He kept whispering, "forgive them." His legs were so weak that He fell to the rocky ground. His scarlet face pounded the dirt. Someone carried the beam as He raised His head. The ones He loved, hammered the beam into the other. They shoved Him onto the cross of wood. His arms were stretched. He cried out as spikes were hammered through His wrists and His feet. They jerked His body hanging on a cross into a hole. He heaved in pain and gasped for air. Suddenly, weight of unmeasurable size fell upon His shoulders that made His physical pain seem small. It squeezed around Him. The darkness of the world fell upon Him. He tried to breath. The weight was beyond overwhelming. He was suddenly, for the first time, separated from His Father. He used the strength of a broken human to beg His Father, "why?"

The angels of Heaven waited. They were prepared for His command to come to His rescue. They were ready if He had enough. They knew that He could stop it all. His accusers could be hanging on crosses at any moment He wanted. He was not under their control. All of creation waited as this man hung on a tree. The past, present and future relied on this moment. The angels waited, ready and prepared. But the man hung there, heaving for a breath so He could again say, "forgive them."

He lifted His head and said, "it is finished." He died. He died as the world shook with agony. It had been finished. Those below Him were confused by those words.

He was taken down and laid in a tomb. He was sealed off from the world. He was dead. It was finished. This man was gone like all men who die.

But then... this was not just a man. He broke the chains of death as no feeble man can. He sat up and placed his feet onto the cold stone floor. He was alive. He is alive.

This was a man and was yet was God. The innocent One who allowed Himself to be slaughtered for me. God allowed Himself to be killed for a creation that had turned it's back on Him. He loved those that He could have banished. Before you or I knew we need Him, He knew that we needed Him. He kept the angels of Heaven at bay as suffered utterly alone. He took my evil upon His bloody shoulders and loved me anyway. He arose and still loves me. He didn't have to, but He did. I am not worthy to say His name. But He calls me His Friend. He loves me. He is Jesus, the King of kings. And one day every knee will bow.

Happy Easter!

Car wash, Greek and My Birthday

2011-04-20T16:18:00.005-04:00

Disclaimer: This is a hodge-podge post. It is simply to inform you of the goings in my life. You may not benefit from this at all, but learn more about what I've been doing of late.

Well I am officially 17 years old, as of yesterday. Too close to 20 and too far away from 10 are my thoughts on it. I'm old. But I had a most wonderful day becoming "old" yesterday! It was such a blessing to get to participate in a car wash at Chick-fil-A raising money for the Mexico Mission trip. It was wonderful, even if I did get the job of scrubbing bugs off the front of every car's hood in Wilkes County... or so it seemed. But it was good. We raised a lot of money and had a wonderful time doing it. I actually drove myself to Chick-fil-A (I'd never driven without Mom or Dad in the car. I got my license last week). It wasn't that bad at all... well, except for parking entirely crooked. But Kandace got out of the car and had a fit and told me to park again.

But it was a wonderful car wash, it was such a pleasure to see other young adults, children and "older" adults working hard for the Lord. It was a joy. They even sang Happy Birthday to me and sprayed silly string all in my hair!

I went to Applebees last night and ate a low-cal blondie (low-cal, ha ha). Those things will be in Heaven, I'm sure of it. I had a great time with my family. Just enjoying being together.

Who says Andrew is wild??

It looks so good!

Now on to Greek. Dr. and Mrs. Black came to visit this past Saturday through Monday. It was a wonderful visit and we always miss them when they have to go. They spoke at church on Sunday and Dr. Black kicked off the Greek class we are doing at my church. My brain worked so hard it would have preferred math. Yet at the same time, it was so much fun. Dr. Black has a way of taking an ~~easy~~... um, NOT so easy language and making it fun and exciting. I will be studying Greek for 26 more weeks. Right now I know the alphabet... I have some work to do. But I am looking forward to being able to read the New Testament in its original language so that I don't have to work through translations, but read exactly what God purposed for us to see. It'll be splendid!

It has been a busy and wonderful past few days. The Lord is so good to His children. Are you blessed? Me too. Remember to think about our Savior these next few days leading up to Easter, who 2000 years ago was getting ready to die for our sins and to raise Himself to life again so that we might be saved.

What Is He to You?

2011-04-15T15:07:00.002-04:00

Since my last post was a ~~comfortable~~... I mean, an uncomfortable one, even though it was on my heart by my Father, I thought I would lighten the mood and talk about something more light. Actually, this involves you!

God is many things to His children. He is a Father, Comforter, Rock, Hiding Place, Jealous God, High Priest, Wonderful Counselor, Friend, Redeemer, The Good Shepherd, Refuge and Strength, Bread of Life, Creator.... and so on. What has been to you lately? He is most often my Hiding Place and Comforter. He really is the One whom I run to and feel safe to remain in. When I think of Hiding Place I think of playing hide-and-seek. I used to love that game. I would be in a panic as Daddy counted down as I looked for a hiding place. I would look behind a door and think, too easy. I would try under the bed, too small. I would try the tub, too wet. I would finally find that perfect spot (like in the back of a closet) and sink down in peace. I was always the last one to be found because my hiding place was so good. It was peaceful knowing while I was hiding that my place was good and hidden. God is often my Hiding Place to a world that is coming after me like Dad and Kandace would do when we played. He is a place where my worries can leave. I worry too much. It is wrong and I know that. My stomach is the permanent residence of butterflies, or so it seems. But when I run to my Hiding Place, I meet the Comforter, the One who puts me at ease. He tells me that I'm safe. In Him, nothing can find me. Nothing.

So what is He to you? Please comment and share. What does He help you with? What word describes Him to you right now? I'm anxious to know!

When The Church Compromises

2011-04-13T00:09:00.001-04:00

Why do we compromise our Christianity? Dad was talking to me about dates for a certain event at church and how the church has to work around school schedules, sports, dance, vacations... you name it... the church has to work around it. The Church is constantly compromising. Not only does it compromise its schedule, but it does so morally. We all act great at church or around other believers but then we wear... that to prom?? We say this at school? Why? Where is Jesus in our actions? Why do we somehow make it to everywhere else in the day but somehow by Wednesday night... we're too tired? Where are our desires for the Lord? It is something I constantly wonder about. Why is it that God's stuff is put on the back burner? Ouch. That hurt me when I thought about it.

I was looking at some prom pictures from some girls I know and I was absolutely mortified at the blatant immodesty of some of them. It breaks my heart that girls that call themselves, daughters of God would wear dresses like that. We expect so much out of ourselves in other aspects of life, but when it comes to God, our expectations tend to be so very low. I can't help but look around at the things we watch, way we dress, the way we spend our money, the things we say and wonder, "Why do we compromise?" Satan convinces us that it's okay. We separate God and life. We sing Christian songs at certain places (like church) and then vile and brash songs are played in Christian homes across the board. We compromise in dating. I fail to understand why teens (or any age for that matter) that have been dating for two weeks are holding hands, kissing and acting like married couples. We compromise in so many things. We put what we consider "life" before the One who gave it to us.

There was once a friend of mine who moved here to the "Bible belt" of the South. He once asked soon after moving here, "There are a lot of members of churches around here, but I have a question... where are all of the Christians?" Isn't that an eye-opening question? Especially here in the South, many claim to know Jesus as their Savior, but few really live with Him as the Lord of their lives. Those of us who are followers of Christ desperately need to raise the bar. We do not to compromise the Church and God for everything else.

Do you see how my mind can take a five minute conversation and spin it into a lengthy blog post? Ha ha! I just wanted to share with you what the Lord has helped me see over time. I have seen that we as Christians need to get a backbone and not compromise to the world. We need to stand up... now.

Thanks for taking time to read something like this that steps on all of our toes, mine most certainly included.

Just Having Fun

2011-04-09T14:53:00.001-04:00

I went a week ago yesterday to see the Annie Moses Band and hear Anne Graham Lotz speak in Winston Salem, N.C. It was truly wonderful. Since then I have been thinking about what Mrs. Lotz spoke about. She talked about "knowing what time it is in the world." She spoke from the verses Matthew 24:6-8

And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not alarmed, for this must take place, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom, and there will be famines and earthquakes in various places. All these are but the beginning of the birth pains.

Tsunami in Japan.

I realized just how many things are happening in the world that appear to be "birth pains." She made the comment that there are many brilliant and intelligent people in this world. People that can make sense of the technology we use, those who can stop nuclear explosions in Japan, those who work for NASA. But all of this worldly knowledge means nothing if we don't have wisdom to know what to use the knowledge for.

Thinking about this led me to think about all that we do here in the U.S. The world is in pain, it is in deep crisis. It is obvious that the time when the Lord will return is not far off. I really believe that. There are so many that need to hear of Jesus and of God's love. Then on the other hand, there are those in the Middle East who are trying to figure out how to do away with us and China is over there holding our debt. All of this is going on and I thought, "Hmm. What are we doing?" We are meanwhile, hanging out eating pizza and watching TV. We are doing so very little to prepare ourselves. We don't need to live in fear, but we need to prepare for what may happen.

My whole life I have heard that America is almost "invincible" in a way. We are the world super power. Everything we go up against tends to work out for us. I believe it is has because God has helped us. He has done so because we have been a nation that has sought, for the most part, to do His will. We were built on Christian morals. Over time, these morals have decayed. My point is that, America is not "God's chosen people." He has shown us favor and has taken care of us, but because of our unfaithfulness, I believe He is removing His hand from our nation. We are so busy having fun that we don't see what is going on. The world is in turmoil, in need of a Savior and we are so busy working for whatever and going on vacations that we don't even see it. That's an "ouch" to me too.

We as Christians need to live, knowing that the end could come at any moment. Just as in a real birth, the contractions come closer and closer as the time for the baby to come arrives, so will the pains in this world become more frequent as Jesus' coming draws near. When that day comes I want to be able to say that I didn't waste my time living the American Dream and I was living the dream Jesus set before me. If we would realize as believers of Christ, why we have been put here and seek Him, He will heal our land. I'm just afraid many are too busy having fun. There is nothing wrong with enjoying life, but do we have to separate "fun" from Jesus? Serving Jesus is the funnest thing I've ever done!

A sweet little girl I met while doing mission work in Texas/Mexico.

If my people who are called by my namehumble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land. 2 Chronicles 7:14-15

More Than a Play

2011-04-06T12:27:00.000-04:00

I keep coming back to post a new blog and for some reason... I don't have much to say. This is scary! So I am going to let someone else speak for me and save you one of my rambling posts!

Please check out Justin Gourley's blog post about the part he played in this year's Passion Play. He played the Apostle John and did a wonderful job. He was one of the poor guys that had to wrangle me when I was playing "demon-possessed"! His blog post is excellent and described exactly how I felt about my part in the play as well. Read it and be blessed... Signs of the Times: John: Becoming A Real Disciple.

It is truly amazing how the Passion Play can make you see the Passion of Jesus. Even those of us doing the acting were left in awe of His sacrifice. Justin and I both agreed that kneeling at the cross leaves you teary-eyed. We could say "it's just a play" but it really happened... for us... and for you.

God vs. Disney

2011-04-01T11:55:00.000-04:00

I'll never forget when Daddy told me Santa Clause, the tooth fairy, and the Easter Bunny aren't real. I was one of the gullible children who had to be told, because I believed it up until the last moment. No matter what kids said, I said, "My mommy and daddy tell the truth." Daddy calmly told me one day that for years they had pretended so that I would enjoy Christmas, loosing teeth, and Easter more. I was mortified. But the question I asked still surprises me to this day. I was little and so with all honesty I asked, "Is Jesus real then?" Daddy was taken aback and said, "Of course He is!" To which I replied, "Well, that is what you said about Santa too."

I was genuinely confused. I didn't understand why certain things my parents said I was supposed to realize was just for fun or cute, but some other things that I had been talked to about the same way was to be what I planted my life on. I went into a head spin. What about this movie or that story? What is TRUE? I was desperate to know.

My family started talking about that last night and I began to think about how people and young people especially do not take the Bible seriously. They, like I began to, think that the Bible is just another cute book of stories. Kandace said she had asked some kids her age how many Gospels there are in the New Testament. They didn't know! Do we know how many books there are in the Bible? Did Paul write Ephesians? Was Luke a doctor? Do we know? Ask around, you'll see that people know little to nothing about the Bible. Yet it is what we say we base our lives on?

For a short while I wondered if the Bible was just another book of stories that can be made into cartoons.

Boy, this looks realistic, doesn't it? *sarcasm*

When I was googling for that picture, as I typed in "Noah" the first thing that came up was "Noah's ark" and then to my amazement "Noah and the whale." Not the ark... the whale. Wow. But anyway, look at the cartoon below. Then look at the one above again. One is real, the other is false. Can a four year old tell the difference?

I am so afraid that many children and young adults see the Bible as nothing more than another story. They may say, "I'm saved," but their faith is so weak, that if confronted with a crisis of belief, they would crumble. If we believe that the Bible is the living Word of Almighty God, then is treating it no better than the story of Cinderella good enough? No. Why? I am the reason why. I was terribly confused. My parents spent much time after that showing me how the Bible alone stands. They taught me that Esther is a better role model than Ariel (the mermaid). They told me about the walls of Jericho and how they were uncovered showing that they fell flat down as it said in the Bible. They showed me scientific evidence that the Bible is true. Dad and Mom poured into Kandace and me the Word of God. When I saw that it rose to be the highest priority in their lives, I believed that they must think it is true and I chose (I chose on my own) that I too would believe in it and to prove that I did, I would allow it be what directs my life. Many 18 year olds drive off to college without that firm foundation of faith and when told that Jesus was just another man and that the earth was not created by God, they lose what little faith they had. They look back and chuckle at their old churches with their preachers, Sunday school teachers and parents that said that the Bible is true, but never said why. They just remember them holding the Bible saying, how much it means to them but other than that, the Bible didn't play much impact.

Belief in the Bible takes faith, just like belief that the world began by a bang in space takes faith. If we believe in the Bible and the stories it contains then it should be more than another story we get between Toy Story and Cars.

Jesus is more than Santa. Jesus is my Savior and Lord, the one that died upon a cross and rose from the dead. If we believe Him, then I believe that we should know about Him and what He says in His Word. It is so much more than another story... it is my life.

The Passion Play

2011-03-29T12:29:00.000-04:00

I have not posted in six days! I can feel it too! I have so much I want to say about the past few very busy, but wonderful days.

Saturday and Sunday were the first two nights of the Passion Play at Mt. Pleasant Baptist Church. Being the actress that I am, I just enjoy every moment. There is just something so glorious about standing beneath the spotlight and singing and acting. But to do so for the Lord is the greatest part! I have the honor to play Mary Magdalene who was originally demon possessed by seven demons. You can just imagine what I get to do if you've not been there to see. You can imagine my face covered in dirt (I use random neutral colors of make-up), my hair in a rats nest (it's so lovely), and dirty clothes (very dirty). My adrenaline is at an all time high as I come out screaming, falling, clawing. I am finally brought before Jesus (by two brave young men... I've accidentally hit them both several times) and fall at His feet where He heals me. Sometimes it honestly takes my breath away as I imagine that I am truly before Jesus. I stand there in front of hundreds of people "acting" but deep down I feel Jesus in my spirit reminding me that I too have experienced His power. I may not have been demon possessed, but I was lost and He found me. So jumping up and down after being healed isn't always acting!

The play is just so amazing. Flowing through the ministry of Jesus to the heart-wrenching Crucifixion, the Resurrection and the last scene in Heaven. It brings tears to my eyes when I see the our wonderful actor playing Satan being dragged to Jesus and being forced to bow down. There is just so much underling in that short part of the play. For me evil is officially defeated and I can't wait till that day!

There is simply so much that goes on in the play, it astounds me. Lighting, sound, behind the stage, actors, singers, caregivers, greeters, costume designers, set constructors, video operators, prayer warriors... etc, etc. When all the pieces are together, it is an unbelievable perfomance, with the sole purpose of winning souls for the Kingdom of God. What a joy it is to be able to participate!

So that is where I've been! Rubbing dirt on my face and knotting my hair, all for the glory of Jesus!

If you've not seen the play and if you live anywhere within a couple hours, come out this Saturday or Sunday night! Doors open at 5 and the play begins at 6! You don't want to miss it! I know I sound like a commercial, but I'm serious! It is great!

Is He Enough?

2011-03-23T15:30:00.002-04:00

If you were to have absolutely nothing but the love of God, would you be satisfied? Would I? Would it be enough?

I recently wrote a song and I debated back and forth about the lyrics. Originally the song was an "asking praise song" as I call it. It was a song asking God for love, faith, etc. but I stopped and realized that there are too many songs asking God for things and I wanted to write a song that gives and worships. As I continued to think about it, I was drawn to a special point in my life, a time when I was confronted with having to answer, "Is God is really enough for me?" It was when my Dad and I were in Ethiopia in '09 and my Dad got sick. Really sick. Probably the sickest I've ever seen him. We were staying in Alaba, Ethiopia in a single room that was in a compound. There was no electricity, restrooms or running water. It was just a dark room with a single window covered by a sheet to keep out the flies. It was fine as we were rarely there. My Dad and I taught all day long and ate at the generous home of some Ethiopian friends. Days were packed with a busy schedule.

One morning, however, I woke up to the alarm clock that Dad wasn't turning off. After I had turned it off I realized that Daddy was sick. He was burning up with fever. I soon realized that I had to take care of things myself. After getting some other members of the team to come down the street to check on him, they agreed with me that he had to rest. He was so sick he couldn't hardly sit up. I gave him a hug and left to go teach. I just knew he would be better when I got back or at least on the mend, but he was worse. He was delirious. As there were not restrooms, he had to walk to the end of the compound, which scared me since he hardly knew who he was let alone where the restroom was. The next day he was no better. I came back to check on him at lunch time and to bring him some bread but he couldn't eat it. I was so broken, so terrified. Daddy wasn't getting better. He was supposed to be the strong one. He was the one who encouraged me. But he was so sick with a temp. of 102 and no doctor or hospital anywhere near. We had come all that way for... this? I just wanted to go home. I felt that for the first time, I was really alone. I fell into an exhausted sleep on a suitcase since Dad was on the only bed and I heard the door slowly creak open. I thought I was dreaming as I sat up. Three Ethiopian women came into the room. They were silhouettes against the blinding outside light. They didn't speak to me but I greeted them and went to the bed to try to get Daddy to sit up. I recognized them from some of the women at the church Dad had been teaching at. The students had been told that he was sick, so I thought these ladies must have come to check on him. But they didn't even talk to him or me. They swayed their colorful skirts back and forth and hummed, walking around the small room. They began to mutter with their eyes to the heavens. Their dark faces glistened with tears as they raised their voices in prayer. It sounded almost like a song as they all spoke at once. I couldn't understand their words, but now that I look back I'm glad I couldn't. I was left marveling at the tone of their voices, the tears on their faces and their swaying. I cried with them. Daddy sat up dripping in sweat, eyes closed. I truly believe that was the most genuine prayer I'd ever heard. The presence of God filled my heart in that dark room. The three women slowly ceased and left as quickly as they'd come. Daddy laid back down and I was left sitting on the edge of his bed marveling at the precision of the ladies visit. They had been like angels, not in white with blond hair, but dressed in warm colors with skin the color of midnight. I prayed. It was just me and God. He was all I had and I realized that He was enough. If I had nothing but my Heavenly Father, He was enough.

Daddy slowly got better the next day and was able to continue teaching. He remembered very little about those three days. He saw the three ladies again and thanked them, because not only did their prayers help bring about his healing but they reminded me that God is enough and He's always there to listen. We later realized that Dad had taken a sip of tap water on accident which had lead to his sickness.

The song flowed from that story. It simply became a melody thanking Jesus that He is enough. That time in my life was a major eye-opener. But it was also such a joy I'm going back this fall! I have it so easy compared to the believers there. They live in poverty and rejoice even in persecution.

What about you? Can you say "Jesus is enough?" Do we really have to have something more? Do we really have to have the world's acceptance? Do we have to have to have this or be that? What if a family member dies? What if I lose my health? If we only had Jesus... would He be enough? We all like to say, "Oh, yes! He is all I need." But lets really think about it. He wants to be enough. If we say that he is enough... then He should be.

But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ. Philippians 3:7-8(ESV)

He's Faithful

2011-03-22T13:30:00.002-04:00

I walk up the white stairs that lead to a hall that leads to another. My legs feel weak. My mind is swirling so fast. But I remind myself that I've studied as much as I can, I'll do fine. Deep breath. I step into a small room where I put my purse down. I mutter something nice to the lady sitting behind the desk. She hands me a paper to read stating the "rules." My eyes can hardly focus and I read "no gum." Too embarrassed to spit it out I swallow it. I hand her something she asked for. She types in something on her computer as I glance around the room. I've been here before. The test room. It is quiet except for the soft clicking of computer keys, that most irritating sound. A man asks me if I'm ready and I say "yes" despite the gnawing in my stomach. He never said "follow me" so don't until I realize that I should have. So I run behind him to catch up looking like the dork of the century. After making some comment about me being nervous he points me to the last computer and chair in the room. Thankful for the fact that I won't have to bear the key clicking since I'm all alone, I sit down. I fill out some information about myself on the computer. I keep misspelling my mom's name as my fingers are shaking. I'm really embarrassed since her name is Pam... tough name to spell. I am finally done with all of that garb and I see the button "Begin Test." I suddenly feel a surge of peace and I whisper a quick prayer and click it. The test begins. The first question I don't know the answer, neither do I know the second through fourth. The 90 min. test is ticking by already. I feel a little wave of panic, but its okay, I still have 116 questions! But the questions just keep coming and I don't understand so many. I'm at question 30 and I look up at the time. 55 min left. What?!? I'm spending too much time per question. Oh sweet Lord help me. Question 31, I don't understand this one either. Panic is suddenly taking over me I can't seem to breathe. I just want to quit. I have passed every exam, why is this SO hard? I was never told to study so much about this stuff. I am so mad. I'm failing, I know it. Heat, I'm so hot. What is that horrible smell? Hot pockets? And that beeping... a microwave? Is someone chopping up an onion back there? My eyes are watering. I can't think! Lord, I just want to stop. I still have... I'm calculating... 89 questions! No Lord.

Katy, stop.

Lord?

Stop. Know that I'm here. I always have been.

Peace, so much peace. I can do this and if I fail, it isn't because I didn't study. God is here. I start back. Time dwindles and the questions do as well. I still think I'm failing, but I'm not so angry. I have peace. There is nothing else I can do but do unto the Lord. The last question. Done. I read "To view your score push 'proceed.'" If I haven't passed, it's okay. I push it. I'm holding my breath. I passed! I really did! Maybe the score wasn't what I'd hoped or what I'm used to, but I passed! I stand up and walk out of the room. I am asked to sign my name which I do shaking. I leave on wobbly legs knowing that I have experienced the Lord's peace even in a college exam. I am satisfied.

That was the story of an exam I took last Wednesday. It may seem childish and silly to you that I went so crazy about it, but to me it was a big deal. I was afraid and worried that months of studying would go down the drain. I was in such need of reassurance. At that moment my Heavenly Father was the only one who could help me. He did. He is so faithful.

I tell you this story to remind you to lean on the arms of your Father in Heaven, because they are never unsteady. He is always there. And in the mist of whatever it may be that you are in you can, as I did, experience Almighty God. He is SO VERY GOOD.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Phillipians 4:6-7

The Good-O-Meter

2011-03-17T14:16:00.000-04:00

I love this video. It reminds me how it doesn't matter how bad we are or good we are, if Jesus hasn't taken our place and paid our sin debt, we aren't good enough for heaven. Even though this is just a cute video, it has a deeper message. I am so thankful if I were to have a "file" in heaven, it would need to say nothing but "Child of God."

This World's Only Hope

2011-03-14T20:15:00.004-04:00

Tonight I sat watching the news in utter amazement. Before my eyes I saw footage of entire Japanese towns being washed away. I heard that around 10,000 have been found dead and tens of thousands are still missing. Families have been torn apart by the catastrophe. There are miles upon miles of rubble. Billions of dollars of damage.

It is amazing to think that last Monday at this time Japan and all those now dead or lost were living their normal lives without the thought of an earthquake's soon appearance. I wonder what they would have done if they would have known it was coming. Would they have left? Probably. Would the nuclear plants ensured the saftey of the nuclear reactors? I'm sure. But they didn't know. That is part of life, we just don't know what is next.

There is something far worse than a Japanese tsunami and earthquake coming, far worse than a hurricane like Katrina, far worse than any war this world has seen... it will be the Tribulation and ultimately, hell. After God has sent Jesus to come and get His children, the world will go through catastrophe after catastrophe. Then worse than that, those left will be sentenced to an eternity seperated from God. I know it's coming. If you've called upon Jesus to be your Savior and Lord, then you know it is coming too. So I asked myself, "WHY AREN'T I TELLING EVERYONE???." Unlike the 'quake that devistated Japan, I know Jesus is coming back. He's told me so.

I was left thinking, "Oh, it's so sad that there was nothing to let them know that a 'quake and tsunami were coming. It just sprung on them." Their saving grace could have been to evacuate a few hundred miles from their coastal Japanese homes. And I know what the world's saving grace from an eternity in hell is, Jesus. Jesus Christ, the One who carried the weight of the world's sins upon His shoulders. The One who rose again. So why aren't we telling more people. I'm trying, maybe you are, but what if we knew Jesus is coming back tomorrow or in a week or month? We need to pretend He is. Those we tell may not believe us, as those in Noah's day didn't believe a world wide flood was coming, but at least they had been told. I don't want those I came in contact with while on this earth to look back and say, "Katy never even told us." Let's not assume people know the love and knowledge of God's grace. We have to show them through our words and actions.

Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age. Matthew 28:19-20 (NIV)

And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not alarmed, for thismust take place, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and^(D) kingdom against kingdom, and there will be famines and earthquakes in various places. All these are but the beginning of the birth pains. Matthew 24:6-8 (ESV)

Things like Japanese earthquakes have a way of reminding me to set my mind and heart on things above. It also reminds me that Jesus really is this world's one and only hope.

How Will They Remember Me?

2011-03-11T12:02:00.001-05:00

I was reading my Dad's blog today entitled Signs of The Times. He said, "Tsunami warnings and sirens are blaring in Hawaii as they await the waves of unknown size to strike their coast. The same is true for the west coast of the U.S. Sounds like something out of a movie doesn’t it? But it’s not. It’s really happening. Sometimes we forget that we are living in tumultuous times and in what I believe are the last days. Kind of shakes us out of our lethargy and apathy. What if it all ended today?"

What if it all ended today? Then I started to wonder, have I done enough? Have I worked my whole life (even if it has only been 17 years) with all that I am so that when I die God will say "Well done good and faithul servant"? I then began thinking about how I could excuse with the fact that I'd planned on having longer to witness and such and my life ended too soon. What a pathetic excuse. Why aren't I living like today's my last day? And I'm not talking about going to Disney World or the Bahamas. What if today was the last time you could witness to your family member, or your friend? What if it's my last? Sure, it probably won't be, but what if?

If a Tsunami were to take us out today, would we have lived our lives so strongly for Christ that people left behind could say without doubt, "He/she lived with serving Jesus as his/her main priority"? Even if we can't hop a plan and be a missionary in Uganda, can the people around you see that Jesus is your Lord, by the way you serve where you are?

Dad was reading me an artical the other day that stated that non-Christian American teens (Christians in general for that matter) are most disgusted with Christians because they are hypocrites. They say, "If they [Christians] really believe in their God, then why wouldn't they live like it?" That struke me to the core. My immediate response was one of defense for myself. I began to think about all the mission trips I've been on, how I sing at church, how I say this or that about how I love God, how I, I, I. I just keep saying "I." Where is God in this equation? Can people see Him in me? Not just in those big things but by choosing to smile when I could let loose, or by using money that my nature would like to use on myself toward something greater for God. No wonder unbelievers are confused! If we really BELIEVE that Jesus is what we should live for, then why isn't Jesus what we're living for? If I were to say I'm a Carolina fan and yet I wore Duke blue, talked about Duke constantly, invested money in going to see Duke play, and seemed to care little for Carolina, would you still believe that I LOVE the Tarheels? I doubt it. If we LOVE God, then we should talk about Him constantly, invest money into His purposes, and live with His light shinning through us. Do you like how I compared Carolina and Duke? With Carolina like Christ's puposes and Duke as like.... the devils. He. He. Just had to throw that in.

So if a Tsumani were to take us out, what would those left say about us? What have we lived for? Not what will we live for, but what have we lived for? Even if you are doing well, we can always to better. If I were to suddenly fall over dead right here, I want others to be able to say what a follower of the Most High King I was. That is a life with purpose!

Don't skip the verses, they are encouraging to a heart like mine.

Hebrews 12:1-3

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Matthew 7:24
"Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock."

Eight Instruments and Four Friends

2011-03-08T17:05:00.000-05:00

The Lord must have smiled on us today as I just returned from a lovely afternoon making music and spending time with my dear cousins and sister. We basked in the enjoyment of the sound of two violins, two mandolins, two guitars, a viola and a banjo. It was truly so very fun to just start playing and singing.

I am so very blessed to have such wonderful friends, that happen to be my family! We wouldn't know what to do without each other! We are the same four that have played in the algae waters of our creek, trudged the snow laden hills, played Apples to Apples more times than imaginable, made mud pies with the red North Carolina earth, ran from snakes, drunk over-chocolaty hot chocolate, and lived with the knowledge that the other three are always nearby. Life just wouldn't have be the same without them. God gives us people like that to love and to be loved by. They are a prayer warriors. They are the best still; the best even though things have changed and we're older.

So I've come to say, be thankful for the Christians in your life, the ones that hold you up, put a smile on your face, argue sometimes, make mistakes, but love always and give. I am thankful for a Mom that loves me so much that she stays home to teach me the Truth, a Daddy who is an example of what a father, husband and pastor should be, for a sister that loves me even when I fail, for my sweet Clara Fu that reminds me of childlike faith with her humble smile, and for my brother that reminds me of my patience :), for my tall PaPaw Brown's deep voice that makes every worry leave my mind, for my petite MaMaw's red lips that always say something to make me laugh, for my MeMaw's patience, for my PaPaw George's love for music that came to me. I'm thankful for the cardinal I see out my window at this moment, the aroma of meatloaf from downstairs, the sound of little voices, for the books full of knowledge surrounding me, the laptop I'm typing on to tell you this, and the mind I have to send these words through my fingers. I'm thankful.

To continue my ramblings, be a friend to someone who doesn't deserve it. Appreciate the ones who still love you. Smile when you're sad. Love because He first loved you. If you're a child of the King, you're blessed. Be thankful. Now go hug someone.

I love you Taylor, Leah and Kandace. You are special and I'm thankful for you all.

The God Vending Machine

2011-03-05T14:44:00.003-05:00

You pop a dollar in, push a button or two and what you requested falls from a shelf and drops to where you are to retrieve it from a little swinging door. A vending machine. Easy and quick, unless it is out of order. :)

I've been thinking again, don't get scared! I've been thinking about God and what we ask of Him. It's like I mentioned in "Servants of God," we tend to request a lot. But what is worse than that is that when we come to ask we are full of yucky sin. As I listen to Christian music, speakers and believers of Christ, I hear all that we want from God and then in the same breath that they're going to go watch a movie that is far from godly. I see how we make fun of our mistakes to say that "God will forgive me, He loves me no matter what!" He does! But He is a righteous God and He hates sin. He can use bad for good, but He wants good from us!

I hear people who say, "I just keep sinning, but God keeps forgiving!" But if we love God, then why are we willing to hurt Him by continuing to sin.

I've noticed that we run up to God, like we do a vending machine and we say, "Okay, God I love you so much and I really want this and I need it now. So how much do I owe you? No more than a dollar I hope!" I know this is tough, but it bothers me and I want to know your thoughts too! Why is it that we joke about our sins, continue watching, saying and doing what we want and yet expect this loving God to give us what we want? There is a confused perception of God among many Christians. God is loving and kind, but He is also jealous and righteous. He is the God that made the universe, swept back the Red Sea, knocked down the walls of Jericho, killed 185,000 Assyrians, and sent His son to die upon a dirty cross. He is worth more than our half-hearted prayers, and excuses for our sins. I can't imagine how tired He gets of hearing our requests when our hearts are so far from Him. I believe many don't hear from God because He can't talk to them through their walls of sins. God is "just" and He can't ignore sin. But when a murder kills someone, don't we want justice? God sees all sin as equal and He must have justice. He wants to hear our requests, but He wants to sit down to a "meal" with Him where we cleanse our hearts and conversate rather than run up to a vending-machine asking for something quick.

God is so much greater than we seem to understand. In the Old Testament the name of God was not allowed to be said by anyone other than the Priests. Now we throw around the word forgetting how sacred His name really is. He wants our fellowship, but He doesn't want to be seprate from the rest of our lives. When we get home from church, He doesn't want us to forget about Him. Imagine if we spent our whole lives eating junk out of vending machines? A bag of Lays here, a Chips Ahoy there, and soft drinks all the time. We would be sick and unhealthy. God wants us to sit down to a healthy meal, where our spiritual bodies are reguvinated through His presence. He alone can fill our souls with what is good.

I know this blog post has been a lot like "Servants of God," but this is what God put on my heart to say: God is worth more than what we give Him. He is worth more than excuses about why we do this or that. James 4:17 says, "Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins." God is God and He deserves so much more than we could ever give, but lets try to give Him all we can, not just in praise but through our lives.

The 'Real' World

2011-03-02T11:57:00.000-05:00

We've all been either told or have said at some point, "You need to get in the real world!" It's a fine statement, often used when what you're doing doesn't line up with "reality." Someone recently told me that when they were giving me a hard time about being homeschooled. It got me thinking about it. I started to wonder, "What is the 'real world'"? It is a celestial ball, but it is also a place that is, at this point, ruled by Satan and his followers. Jesus will be the King of this World, but at this point Satan is having a hay-day with the globe, but soon, praise the Lord, it will be ripped from his grasp.

If we are Christians, our lives should look very different from this world. It should be a compliment to be told to "Get in the 'real world.'" When I was told this, it made me frustrated because I felt like they thought that I am naive to this world and the world of "modern teens." And then it dawned on me, I am! I know very little about what goes on among teenagers these days. I have a lot of friends from all over the country and even all over the world, but I am still naive. I don't say that to make myself look good by any means, but I thanked God that He has made me a creation that is neon compared to a very black and white world. I didn't do it, He did. I suddenly realized that I do not want to be of this world. Many Christians, not only live in the world (we obviously have to be in the world), but are of it as well. It hurts me to see so many teens (I'm going to talk about teens since I am one) claiming Jesus as their Savior and yet when you talk to them about God, Jesus, or church, they laugh (I'm not kidding). We do need to be in the world and witness to others, but there is a difference between being in as a Christian and being in just like every other person. You don't have to date, party, talk badly, or whatever else to be in the "real world." Saying that we love Jesus is not enough. Coming to church is not enough. If the shows we watch, things we say and way we live doesn't shine out blindingly compared to this culture, then we are failing. A lady named Linda Horton spoke at a ladies conference at our church a couple weeks ago and one of the greatest things she said was the simple words, "If you say Jesus is your Lord, then He should be your Lord."

Don't skip over this verse, this is what God says on the matter.

1 John 2:15
Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For everything in the world—the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does—comes not from the Father but from the world.

Standing out.

It is good not to be apart of this world! We don't have to catch up with the latest. We are living for an entirely different purpose, to serve God and work for the Kingdom of Heaven. We can witness and help others like Jesus did when He was here, but we need to be very careful that we don't get pulled down. The next time someone says "You need to get in the real world!" I'll be happy that God is using me as a neon orange light to a very bleak world. Will you join me as a light to this world? Then others will see that we can be a light without being of this world.

Servants of God

2011-02-26T18:01:00.000-05:00

We live in a culture that is always wanting more. Do you agree? Did you know that there is a thing called "update addicts"? They are people that have to get the newest phone. They have to, or so they think. I remember when the "razor" cellphone was hip and then blackberries and iPhone and ipads took over. Americans seem to constantly want. We also constantly "want" from God too. I do, at least. My prayers can easily sound like a list of requests. We often come to church just to see what we can get out of it. I once heard Beth Moore put it that we can be like beggars. We walk around with beggar cups asking people to fill us up, asking God to fill us up. We simply want to be entertained, comforted, pleased, and fulfilled. It's the "what can you do for me?" mentality.

I've been thinking a lot about being a servant. It's easy to choke on that word. Servant. We feel too good to be servants right? Cinderella was a servant. We need to go after happily ever after, like we're told, right? Being a servant isn't usually at the top of life goals. There is in fact only one kind of servant that I'm willing to be, a servant of God. It seems weak and pitiful doesn't it? But I take a look around me at this selfish, "it's all about me" world and Jesus has shown me that there is a greater way for living. But everywhere around us, we are pushed to take care of ourselves and make sure that we are happy. I think that churches would be stronger, families would be better and that Christians would be closer if we would stop worrying about ourselves and become servants. Not just servants, but servants of the Most High. We can be the star of the show in something that doesn't matter, or we can take a piece of the role in a purpose that lasts. We're all servants of something. For some, it is popularity, for others it is work, etc. But it is a tragedy to spend our lives living for the wrong thing. I only want to serve what matters. Don't you? And the best part, is that the One I'm serving, served me in the greatest way. He gave His life for me. If we call Him our Lord, we should be willing to do whatever He asks. We as Christians, especially American Christians, need to stop trying to fill our cups. If we become sold out servants of the King, He'll provide our every need! It's easier said than done, but if we can grasp the concept of being Christians with servant hearts, we could change the world.

Romans 12:1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship.

Rain, rain

2011-02-24T12:19:00.000-05:00

I'm afraid I have nothing of any value to say, but let me assure you, these words are my thoughts:

February Rain

To be the mud, the bog, the mire;
To soak the bones in February –
Eons from the autumn shower–
Even from a summer berry!

The crying air was lost in rhythm:
Drums incessant in the drops;
Not a chance for rainbow prism –
Even if the hammering stops!

Still the clouds are hammering,
Hammering home their dreary aim –
A chatterbox in constant yammering,
Drenching all to make a claim.

Mark R Slaughter

We do need this rain, but I can't help but get a little spoiled to the beautiful weather we've had lately! Even on such a miry (in weather, or heart) day we can say:

Psalm 40:2-3

He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
   out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
   and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth,
   a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear the LORD
   and put their trust in him.

If your heart feels gloomy and rainy like this day, cheer up and sing a new song on the solid rock! :)

My Daddy

2011-02-21T22:40:00.000-05:00

My Daddy has been very busy lately with a big project, a dauntingly big project. A book. He has been working on writing a book entitled, Rite of Passage: Raising Christ-Centered Young Adults. Raising young adults is quite a topic and he has been writing with all of his power.

Even now as I'm typing this, I can hear Dad and Mom discussing the contents of the book. Mom has helped Dad tremendously with it, especially with the English. But right now they are surrounded with stacks of paper, pens and computers. He has typed and written and typed and written. Sometimes I'll throw in my "two cents" but I mostly just listen. It is so much to think about.

Not only has my Daddy been writing, but he has also Pastoring our church. And that is quite a responsibility. With all of this, it would be easy for him to put a hold on being a Daddy. It would be easy to neglect his family. But he doesn't and it honestly amazes me how much he still shows he cares. Yesterday for example, I was about to have a nervous breakdown, (not really, but I felt like it) about a ton of piano pieces I had to have ready by today. To make matter worse, a song had somehow been missed and I hadn't practiced it. Daddy was on the computer working and when I showed him all the pieces I had to have ready. I thought he would mumble, "I'm sorry" and I'd move on, but he stopped, grabbed my hand and bowed his head. He prayed for me. I'm not a crier, but at that moment, I got choked up. It was more than a prayer, but him showing me that he loves me and he cares. Today in piano went pretty well, by the way.

For the past week or so, he has put notes on Kandace's and my nightstands with Bible verses to read, that we would discuss later. He has played with Andrew and Clara too. He continues to show us that the book is not going to come before his family. I'm not saying all of this to put him on a pedestal, but to say that I do have the best Daddy. He is worth more than anything he could give me. I just had to share that. I love my Daddy! He is truly a reflection of my Heavenly Father.
I'm saying all of this and it's not even Father's Day! ;)

Time

2011-02-18T12:24:00.000-05:00

Clara, Kandace, and myself on Easter 2006

I remember when I was little, adults would say, "The older I get, the faster time flies." I just smiled like a good little girl and thought, It seems like a hundred years between Christmas and my birthday! How can they think "time flies"? Well, now I'm starting to understand what they mean. It really seems like I was just 8 years old, when I got lost at Disney World or 11 when we started the adoption process to get Clara. I was little. I remember sitting at the kitchen table for hours with Daddy, doing math. I couldn't remember my multiplication tables to save my life. 4 x 8 was especially hard (Yes, I remember that). And I know then answer now, 32. I would promise myself that I would never do any math harder than division. That didn't work out, by the way. I remember when I was upset that I couldn't read chapter books and when I couldn't stand writing an essay (my how things change). I used to be terrified of the stage, any stage. When I was 10 or 11 I used to be mortified in a restaurant when the waitress brought me a cup with a LID on it. That was the worst nightmare, because I thought people still saw me as a kid. It seems like I was just little. But reality tells me that I am going to 17 in April.

My siblings and myself last summer

Can you believe that it is already the middle of February? Well, actually I can, it has been a cold winter. But really, Christmas wasn't so long ago, was it? Time moves on and there is absolutely nothing we can do to stop it. It's Friday, and most people like the weekend, but before you can blink, it will be Monday again. Sometimes I wish I could stop the clock and let those special days stretch out longer. The point is that we must use every day we have for Jesus. We have to remember each day and enjoy the time we have. I don't want to worry about being 18 before I've even gotten live 17. Each time I sing in the Praise Team at church, I try to remind myself that that is one less time I'll get to witness through music on that stage and I should give it my all. Every time we talk to a non-Christian and don't mention Jesus, time is slipping and we may be their only hope. I'm not trying to be negative, but we can't forget that we won't be here forever. Time ticks on, so we have to do all we can for the Kingdom of God. It is pointless to live our lives just for the relaxation we may get toward the end of it. I want to do the best where I'm at. If I'm writing, I want to write the best I can. If I'm singing, I want to try my hardest. If I'm playing basketball, (something I'm not too good at!) I would have to do my best, even if it isn't "my thing." Sometimes things aren't "our thing" in life, but we have to try because God could use that. We are doing a Passion Play at our church and there is a lot of acting involved. Well, I love to act, but I know there are some that are in it, could take it or leave it. They still choose to do their best, because it is an opportunity to serve Jesus in this very short life.

That was a rabbit track. But I'm glad I said that. These are my points, for all of you type "A" people. Hehe. Life is short. We have to live it for Jesus. In everything we do, whether we think it is "our thing" or not, we have to do our best where we are at. Jesus wants to use us if we could just get our minds off of worrying about tomorrow. Time is ticking and the Kingdom of God is coming.

The Waters Parted

2011-02-15T11:06:00.000-05:00

This is the story of one of the greatest miracles in the Bible. I hope you enjoy it though the eyes of a child.

The Waters Parted

I remember the howl of the wind outside my home that dark night. No moon shown across the dry land. Mama held me in her arms and sang in her smooth, low voice. She sang songs of deliverance. Songs of Hashem. Abba hummed harmony as he ran his rough hands over Eliam’s wooly hair. The shanty door creaked eerily. We waited and waited. Abba had told me that an angel was coming that night, an angel of death. My father had swiped the scarlet blood over the doorframe of our home just as Moses had ordered. The blood would be a sign to the angel that no firstborn would be taken from this home. All of neighbors had done as we had, with hope rising in our hearts. Would this be the end? How many horrible plagues must Hashem send before Pharaoh would let us go?

I closed my eyes when suddenly I heard it. The cry of the Egyptians is a sound I will never forget. The pitch sent a chill down my back. Mama jumped up as Abba scurried to the door. The anguished, deep groan of a mother after losing her child filled the night air. Mama squeezed me tightly as a tear ran down my face. The angel had taken what was his.

“It has passed,” Abba muttered. He turned to Mama and said with a slight smile etching his shadowed face, “Let us praise Hashem.”

A few hours later as the sky turned from deepest black to pale purple, the cry of the Egyptians still carried through the land. We heard a loud knock. Abba’s friend, Josiah, smiled at me as I led him inside. He seemed rushed and frantically looked for Abba.

“Jael, where’s your father? I must speak…Ah, there you are Caleb!”

Abba immerged from behind me putting a hand on my shoulder. “What is it?”

“Pharaoh has… well, he is setting us free! Oh, can you believe it, Jael?” He smiled into my shocked face.

“What? It is over?” Mama asked in disbelief as she walked in with Eliam on her hip.

“Yes!” Josiah nearly shouted out. “Pharaoh lost his firstborn son and can take no more. He called for Moses just a few hours ago. Moses has ordered that we must leave now. Gather what you need and prepare to leave immediately.” He grasped Abba’s hand and disappeared into the early morning.

I had never heard anything as joyful as the sound of the Israelites that dawn. The shouts of joy and anticipated gathering of belongings. My heart beat wildly as I helped Mama lift the last of our few possessions on the back of our donkey. I glanced at our poor abode for the last time. I couldn’t help the little twinge of sadness I felt. I knew our new home would be better, and belong to us. There would be no overseers lashing Abba’s back for not working as hard as they desired, and there wouldn’t be a lack of food. We would make no more bricks. I couldn’t imagine such a thing. All I had seen for the nine years of my life was the straw, mud and bricks and felt the oppression of the hot sun beating down upon my tired back, but there would be no more. After four-hundred years, Hashem had saved us.

“Jael, come now.” Mama pulled my hand, leading me away from the house.

The slave streets were packed. To the streaked horizon there was nothing but Israelites, thousands upon thousands of us. A lady beside me began singing in an elated voice and I joined in with her, letting my heart rise with the sweet words. My throat stung with tears as I rejoiced. Suddenly we had passed the slave quarters and were walking by the Egyptian homes. I gripped Mama’s arm and anxiously asked her if we should be there.

Mama’s thin face melted into a pearly smile. “Jael, we are free! We can go where we please! Isn’t it wonderful?”

It still seemed a little scary to me, so I hung onto her hand. As I watched the ornate homes, Egyptians opened their doors and watched us. Some of their faces were angry and others cried. The women began tossing gold and jewels into the street. Others around me fell to the ground gathering the jewelry. Mama and Abba didn’t gather any and walked on in silence.

“Mama, why don’t you want the any of the gold or jewels?” I asked as a lady offered her a handful of sparkling riches.

“I don’t need gold to bring me joy. Hashem has set us free and that is all I need,” she said.

We journeyed through the desert. Herds, flocks and humans followed the faint image of Moses and Aaron. The darkest cloud was leading Moses and guiding our path. After arriving at Succoth we went south. Far south. At night a glowing flame led us. It licked at the starry sky as Egypt and bondage disappeared behind us. We walked on and on. Finally, we ceased our travels to rest. I slipped off my sandals and massaged my weary feet as Mama served us the unleavened bread we had brought. It soothed my stomach and I fell into a deep sleep. I dreamed of a land flowing with milk and honey, the land of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.

A day later, we were near the Red Sea. We had walked all day to see nothing but the yellow desert. We had stopped as the sun was making its descent and I was completing a few jobs for Mama. I began to feel the odd sensation of the ground shaking beneath my feet.

“What’s that sound, Mama?” I asked, beating the stubborn dust from a blanket.

Mama walked over to me as Abba stood from cleaning the donkey’s hooves. “I don’t know. It’ll be fine. Abba will find out.”

Those around us quickly heard and stopped their work, frantically asking what was happening. A few moments later, Abba and a few other men sprinted back from wherever they had been. As Abba’s tall frame approached, I could see his face was damp and his eyes fearful.

“They’re coming back. Pharaoh is leading an army of Egyptians to take us,” he heaved, shaking his head in disbelief.

Mama’s face broke my heart. I felt disappointment squeeze my throat. Tears immediately welled in my eyes, making her face a blur.

“Why, Caleb?” Mama breathed. Her hands balled into fists. “How could this happen? What has Moses said?”

“I don’t know. We are surrounded by the sea. We have nowhere to go…”

Abba’s deep voice broke. I put my arm around him, trying to give him any measure of peace I could. Mama covered her face. I looked around to see thousands of distraught and panicked people. As I looked beyond the mess, I saw the shimmering Red Sea. The sparkling waters seemed to laugh at us. Yet, I knew deep down in the depths of my heart that Hashem was in control, even if Pharaoh had never intended to set us free. Yahweh hadn’t led us out of slavery to bring us back there. He would provide a way.

We gathered together our things and stood wondering what to do. Eliam and the younger children played gaily, not realizing or understanding what was happening. Mama sang under her breath. Abba talked with a few other men in fervent tones. The sun left beautiful colors across the desert sky. As the light dwindled, so did our hope. Suddenly, the cloud before us turned into a fiery flame. It lit up the sky, reminding us that Hashem was still there. I wished that we could have taken off and soared away like birds, but there was nothing we could do.

“Look there!” Abba suddenly pointed off into the distance. What I saw made my blood boil. “Dust. It is certainly the Egyptians with their horses and chariots.”

“Abba, Hashem isn’t going to let them take us, is He?” I had asked, with my eyes set on the growing cloud.

“He has a plan. We will trust in Him.”

Thousands of us stood there waiting, dreading, and hoping. Parents held their children. We squinted our eyes as the first glimpse of the Egyptians were seen. I looked down for a moment, ringing my hands. I was trying to believe it wasn’t happening. I must have been looking down in a deep stupor for longer than a moment, because when I glanced up, the Egyptians were much closer, so close, I could almost see their furious faces.

Suddenly, a young man nearby shouted out with vigor. Anxious conversation rippled throughout the mass of people. I looked up to see the two barely visible men standing on a hill over the sea. I turned to the sound of Egyptians; their brash voices finally coming to our ears. The hundreds of chariots roared like thunder. Children began to cry, mothers were shaking with grief, but the father’s faces were the worst. So many Abba’s with clenched jaws and tears in their eyes. The hope that we were just growing accustomed to was being ripped from our hands.

The glowing flame before us swirled mightily. It left its place and danced over our heads. At first I thought it was leaving us; that Hashem was deserting us. It stopped in front of the Egyptians and lowered as a wall in front of them. Terror covered their faces and they halted to an abrupt stop. I had never felt such relief or been in such awe. We turned to see Moses lifting high his staff. What happened next still leaves me speechless. Wind whooshed around us. My hair swept onto my face. I could feel the spray of sea mist. The shining sea was no longer calm but in a furry of waves. The water rocked and to my utter amazement, began to pull apart from where Moses stood. It seemed as though the very hand of Hashem was sweeping back the dark waters. I could begin to catch a glimpse of the sea floor. The water groaned and heaved as it stacked into two overwhelmingly massive walls. My heart pumped against my chest. I dared not take my eyes off of the wonder.

The sea had at last split, leaving a path. The people began to move toward the waters as Moses strode down the hill and between the walls. There were gasps and shouts of joy, but above it all were the shouts of the Egyptians behind us as they looked though their barrier in utter shock. We quickly grabbed our things without thought and followed into the waters. The murky walls raised so highly that my stomach rolled. We walked on all night as if in a dream. We couldn’t help but turn to see if the wall of fire still remained, and it did.

Daylight was welcomed as the last of the people came out of the other side of the sea. We climbed onto the shore and turned to look over the waters. The barrier of fire suddenly disappeared into a haze of smoke. Fear gripped my mind. Wouldn’t Hashem close the waters before they came? But the walls remained after the last of the Israelites had trudged up the sandy hill. The Egyptians rose dust along with the smoke as they stormed toward the sea. I squeezed Abba’s hand harder as at last the entire Egyptian army was in the midst of the dark waters. I remember thinking it seemed as though they were between the palms of Hashem. I let out a gasp as the waters suddenly made a churning sound. The walls suddenly collapsed on the army like bricks that had been stacked too high. It was as though Hashem had squashed them between his mighty hands. The sea groaned and swirled. The screams of the army were hardly audible. Shouts rose up from the people. Tears streamed down the faces of children and the old alike. I turned to Abba. I felt my face pull into a wide grin. Abba’s eyes pierced mine. I’ll never forget the words he spoke as he cupped my face with his hand.

“You have witnessed a miracle, child, a miracle of Hashem that will be told until the end of time. Yahweh has saved us.”

I turned from the sea. The cloud ahead seemed to be beckoning us to follow. Moses lifted high his staff. We were going home, home to the Promised Land.

*Hashem: the Hebrew word for The Name, since the Israelites would say Yahweh, rarely or not at all.

Love

2011-02-13T23:21:00.000-05:00

Love. One of the most popular words in this world. A word and emotion that ties the world together. Have you watched TV lately? How many shows, commercials, or movies are about love? There are a ton. If there wasn't love, the music industy would be hurting too. We all love people and things. People desire to love. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. The day of Love. I started thinking about love and I went and Googled the word. I got a plethora of examples of love. "I love chocolate", "I love my Dad", "I love the beach." We seem to love everything. But love is something with such a deep meaning. Yet we flippantly say it. I do at least. Kids tell their boyfriends or girlfriends that they "love" them. We tell people that we "love" a certain restauraunt and we say that we "love" God.

Humans need love. We like to be told that we are loved. How do we often greet others that we know? We hug them!

We like to show love. God loves us. We hear this all the time. But really, He is Love. He loves in the most perfect form. It is never ending. We are made in His image, so we too crave love. There are obviously many forms of love. There is Agape love, which is brotherly love. Eros, that is the love between a man and woman. Philia, the love between friends or family. And then there is Storge, which is natural affection, like the love between a parent and his child. I say all of this to show you just how much there is to that simple word.

But in thinking about Valentine's Day, I thought about the greatest act of love ever shown. The love that rescued us when we were going to a very bad place. We had done everything wrong and yet this Love reached out and chose to forgive. He even left the glory of His home on high to come here to the place He created. He didn't just come, He suffered and allowed Himself to be killed brutally. Then He rose from the dead. All of this for you and me because He loved us. He loves us. Have you thought lately about the fact that He didn't have to. But He did. Let's love others, but love Him more. Remember, that simple word is better revealed through our actions. Show Jesus your love this Valentine's Day.

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

Opening Our Eyes to The World

2011-02-11T18:05:00.000-05:00

Did you hear that Hosni Mubarak, the Egyptian President, stepped down today after the army threatened to turn in their uniforms and join the protesters? Right at this very moment hundreds of thousands of people are celebrating in Egypt.

This whole Egypt ordeal has reminded me that the world is a crazy place sometimes. Riots, wars, poverty, confusion. We can't pretend these things aren't happening, because we live in the most powerful nation, at this point. America is not a "protected nation" just because it is America. Things can happen here too. I believe God has helped this nation over the last 200 hundred years because we were built on His Word and we have followed it for the most part. Things are changing though, all over the world. If you want to learn more about the changes leading to the rapture, I greatly encourage you check out a new blog a friend of mine started, http://disciple05rocketmail.blogspot.com/. Justin really enlightened me on all that is happening in the world, especially in Egypt.

The truth is, it will only get more difficult until Christ returns. I believe the Lord will be here before long! But regardless of how hard it may get or what happens, those saved by Jesus are God's children and we are always in His hands. Our destination is for sure and for certain. Let these words sink into your heart. “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33. Jesus has overcome the world! We don't have to fear.

Winter Snow

2011-02-10T14:59:00.000-05:00

Here is the song I sang at MPBC at Christmas. I know some of you have been asking for a video so I just got it recorded last night. I really love the song and the simple and beautiful truth that Jesus came like a winter snow. Quiet, soft and slow... to save us. I hope you enjoy, Winter Snow.

Readers are Leaders

2011-02-09T13:51:00.000-05:00

As technology soars people spend more and more time playing and messing on screen devices. There are glossy flat screened TVs, Ipads, Iphones, Xboxes, and computers everywhere.

They are so inviting and are fun and even useful, but suddenly the reading levels of children have dropped unbelievably and the use of these devices seem to be a large part of the reason. A Fox News article in 2007 revealed, “The lack of reading is the most important socio-economic issue in the United States today.” It said that 72% percent of high school graduates were deemed by employers as “deficient” in reading and writing. Less than 50% of 9 year olds read more than 5 books a year, other than for school and 20% in high school.

There was a time in this nation when reading was common. People even enjoyed it. Many kids I talk to now laugh at reading and books as though they are outdated. I've seen several Facebook profiles that say in the "favorite books" section, "Seriously, who reads books??" How sad. I can honestly say where the majority of my learning has come from is reading. Even books that I chose, I learned from. I took a college class on Anaylzing Lit. and was mortified by all of the Old English and confusing poems, but once I dug deeper I actually enjoyed finding the meaning behind the formal, rich words. I was amazed that even something that I had considered "stuffy reading" could really capture the imagination.

A lot of adults have the philosophy of, "Okay, so lets just get kids reading something." So the most popular books, for boys especially, are extremely inappropriate. The titles alone indicate that! So even those who are reading tend to read junk. There are good books out there for kids. I absolutely loved the kid's "Left Behind" series by Jerry B. Jenkins and Tim LaHaye, when I was young. It was 40 fast paced books that were really quite unbelievablely awesome!

Why do I think reading is so important? Because it is proven that those who read, especially thought-provoking books, are more intelligent, and even well-mannered adults. Readers really are leaders. Reading stretches the brain like nothing else. A good book is better than any movie. You've seen a movie and heard someone say, "The book is better." Books have a way of pushing us. Kids have lost this in the fast-paced, thrilled culture. I love Facebook, but it can easily eat up hours of time. People don't know how it feels to have to imagine anything anymore. Sometimes we need to have to be patient for the climax of a book or have to really think about the story line. I love movies and TV shows, but they just don't require much brain power. Reading does. Lets get back to reading and thinking. It is worth it and is incredibly enjoyable.

The Devil Doesn't Like Me

2011-02-07T23:00:00.000-05:00

Have you ever had a time in your life when as a Christian you can sense Spiritual Warfare? There are demons and angels and they don't sit around all day. Demons goals are to distract humans from God. They try to keep the un-saved from ever becoming followers of Christ and the saved are constantly hounded on or are kept from doing their best for God by these Satan followers. Angels are sent by God to help His children and to be used for His purposes. There is a war, a literal war between these two forces. As Christians we are attacked and put down and tempted to sin. These demons don't make us sin, we are ultimately the ones who make the decision, but they poke and prod. Christians who really serve the Lord are targeted even worse. Satan hates it when we do something for the Kingdom of God. It infuriates him and he comes at us even harder. He doesn't want us to witness, he enjoys family disputes, and broken hearts. Those days that homes feel shattered are days that Satan likes. Satan doesn't bother those "Christians" who never do anything, because they don't cause any concern for him. He comes at those who are doing something that bothers him... something that makes Jesus known or praised. We shouldn't live in an overwhelming fear of Satan's tarets on us, but we should be aware. We have to pray for the Lord to send angels to fight on our behalf and on the behalf of lost family members. It is hard. There are days when I feel like Satan has thrown every disaster into my face and my family's. And being a family that is trying to serve the Lord and help others just makes that pressure worse. But God knows that and see that. He never gives us more than we can stand. But there is a War. In the end God wins, but the small battles are up to our prayers. We have the ear of God and He is willing to hear and help us. Even though there are days, weeks and months when Satan and his helpers see we are working and he comes hard. I'm not crazy, spiritual warfare is one of the most real things I've ever felt. There is evil. Don't be afraid of everything because of that knowledge, but be aware. And pray. Today feels like such a day that I should pray more. Angels will come to our rescue. We can't back down though. I can't. I'll just let the target on my back get larger. I am glad the Devil doesn't like me or suddenly seems to throw something in my face, it means I must be doing something for Jesus. And Jesus is a friend that will never leave. I'm willing to carry my cross though these temporary battles. Are you willing?

Ephesians 6:12-13 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

A Taste of Ethiopia

2011-02-04T00:00:00.000-05:00

This video is a taste of Ethiopia. Ethiopia, it sounds like just another one of those far off places missionaries talk about, but it is more than just a place to me, it is land I love so very much with people that I call my family. People with hearts as big as the ocean. I can't wait to go back in November. This video brings tears to my eyes... The part with the Bibles is just... ah... you'll just have to watch.

Dating?

2011-02-01T22:45:00.000-05:00

That special day when the bride wears white and she really is pure. The day when two become one for the first time. That amazing moment when you hear, "You may now kiss the bride." The wedding day.

From the youngest ages kids are talked to about the opposite sex. At four or five it's "Sweetie, do you have a boyfriend? You stay away from boys now, they have cooties!" About 12 or so, boys and girls are then told that the opposite sex are no longer yucky but quite good and they should "find one" to like. So kids try to search everywhere for someone to "like" and suddenly friends are making fun of them if they aren't hanging onto a guy's arm or if a guy, doesn't have a girl in tow. Kids are on a great mission to find a boyfriend or girlfriend and deep down they have no clue why. Moms and Dads give smiles and say how cute it is, but they too don't have an answer for why a 12 or 13 year old need to have that "special person." But everyone seems to, so that must be the way it is. By 14 the kids are dropped off at movie theaters or ball games to hang out with their boyfriend or girlfriend or if they don't have one to find one as soon as possible. They go from one to another. They cry in between. Friends are lost because of the ordeals and texts keep the problems in circulation. They claim undying love... for a while at least. Suddenly at about 16, girls and guys are usually in a "serious relationship" and all the little kids admire the "experienced daters." After all, they are really in love. Depending upon college or life, it is all up in the air after that. The boyfriend or girlfriend might last, they may not. Sure, some get married to the person, others don't. But the dating game has finally twisted and tied you in knots so many times you're a little numb and you know how it feels to be kissed a thousands times by now. If that one was not the one then you go to college or get a job and wait until you are about 25 to try again.

Wow. Are you exhausted? What a mess. I am so glad I chose not to live that life from 5-now at least. But is this not the way it goes for so many children and teens? I am thankful the Lord shown me this is not the way to go. It tends to leave your heart torn and broken. I truly believe that the dating game is so dangerous. I want that wedding at the top of this post to be mine. When there are no regrets. I want to wear white and it be true. Kiss for the first time when God can smile upon it. It will be beautiful. I'm not afraid that I'll never "find that someone" because I don't have to find him, God knows who he is and will bring him to me and me to him. And I pray that my heart will be for him and all that is sacred for marriage will belong to us. These are my thoughts on dating and please understand that these are my thoughts, my parents aren't making me think this. They put the information out there, but I got to choose. But really, what is there to choose when all I see around are battered hearts and minds? These thoughts are so counter cultural, but they work and I know people who have made it through. People may look down on me or think that I'm weird, but that really won't matter when my heart is still intact on that special day.

If you feel it is too late for and you and you're a teenager, start now! Keep yourself pure from here on. It is so wonderful. Choose to wait, something we don't like to do, until God says it's time. And let's let little kids be little kids without the oppression of boyfriends and girlfriends. I'm still enjoying being single when I can serve God without hindrance. It is so very freeing.

Mundane

2011-02-01T00:10:00.000-05:00

Today was Monday. Isn't Monday just your favorite day of the week? That was sarcastic. They are most certainly not mine. I woke up this morning to that most annoying alarm clock and had that quick negative thought we all sometimes have "I don't want to get up today." But I did. I put my feet on the icy floor and was reminded, like I am every morning, of how much I need a rug. I then walked down the same creaky steps I always walk down to practice the same piano I've had forever with the sticky "b" key. I went to piano lessons, ate at Chick-fil A (that was actually the highlight of the day :)), went the same old places I always go, studied in the same books, and am now sitting at this same old computer. I just lived Monday. We all, in fact, just lived January 31, 2011.

Life is like that. Most of our lives are spent in a routine of some sort. There are of course times when we go on trips, great vacations, or when there are troubles, but usually things ride the middle, at least they do for me. We can remember how blessed we are, like I mentioned in my last post, but it is hard to always be satisfied in the routine of everyday life. It is one of my greatest struggles. I am bad to ask my parents, "Are we doing anything exciting soon?" I know, I sound like a five year old. It's just that we as humans crave that feeling of excitement and joy.

My Daddy has been speaking on Heaven at MPBC the past four Sundays. Heaven. What do you first think of when you hear that word? (You may be wondering why I'm asking this. I'm coming to a point, hang on!) Do you think of Jesus? Clouds? Harps? Gold? Joy? We don't seem think about Heaven a lot, considering that if we are saved, we'll live there for all eternity. You may think about it, but I don't that much. I've been thinking about it more lately. I'm seeing that it is going to be more than clouds, harps, gold, and joy, but deeper and more beautiful and glorious than our feeble minds can imagine.

Life on earth is just a cycle. High mountains, plains and low valleys. It is never truly satisfying. Jesus is all that satisfies. Being in His presence ihere is just a taste of Heaven. As Christians we long for more of what we experience when in the presence of Almighty God. It will be Heaven when we can worship our Lord in perfectness. Mondays come and go and life passes by, but Heaven is coming. Something so great God has yet to show us. Then our hearts will truly be filled with unspeakable joy.

It reminds me of a fast tempo song we sing at my church:

Counting on God

I'm in a fight not physical
I'm in a war but not with this world
You are the light that's beautiful
I want more, I want all that's yours

Joy unspeakable that won't go away
Just enough strength to live for today
So I'll never have to worry what tomorrow will bring
Because my faith is on the Solid Rock
I'm Counting on God!

Heaven is coming and it will be worth living in the here and now. Don't grow tired of living the life God has set before you. The most wonderful accomplishments are often the ones we don't think matter.

*Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9*

"Un-blessed"

2011-01-26T14:27:00.000-05:00

I found myself this week with a horrible cold. Aches, extreme sinus pressure, sneezes to the point of nausea, coughing to hoarseness, etc. Okay, I've grossed you out. Sorry. We've all had colds though. You know the yucky feeling of a really bad one. While I was sitting in my room miserable I was thinking about how "un-blessed" I was. "I don't feel good, Lord. Is there a problem? I have things to do. Hurry up and make me well."

Meanwhile, I'm completing my study of World War 2. I think I literally know everything about that war. Whew. But anyway, I finally got to where the Allied forces broke through the boarder of Germany in April of 1945, after 5 long years of war. Behind the evil Hitler's walls were Nazi concentration camps. I've known about the persecution of the Jews and many other peoples because of Hitler's power and desire for a "pure" race, but I didn't realize how very bad the people were treated. Brutally murdered because of who they were. Million were killed, just.... because.

Then I looked at my friend, Dr. Black's blog http://daveblackonline.com/blog.htm. I see the faces of my friends, people I know and have met in Ethiopia. Below their faces are the words, "They are following me to attack. Keep praying." The persecution is mostly where my Dad and I went in 2009. My friends are in danger for their lives. I know we've all heard about foreign missionaries or persecuted Christians in third-world countries and all too often we feel sorry for them and thank the Lord we are blessed and for being an American. A sheltered American. Lord help us, if anything really bad were to happen to this nation, I'm afraid many would cease to claim the name of a Christian. But see, I've been with those people in the pictures, who are now under persecution. I'm their family, and I feel different now about their safety. They are in danger of their lives but continue to stay strong through the strength of Jesus' power.

So back to my cold. It doesn't look like a big deal anymore does it? It is a cold. No one is chasing me to have me killed because I'm a Christian or because of the way I look. I'm sitting in a comfortable chair, in a warm house at a computer with Internet access, I'm not starving, I have cold medicine, and I even get to go worship, learn and fellowship with other believers tonight. Isn't that wonderful?! But the best part is that the God of the Universe sent Himself in the form of a baby to the earth. He lived, got sick, stumped his toes, was hungry, tired, and died upon a cross. A dirty, grimy cross, because He loves me and you. And I'm sad because I have a stuffy head? Really?

We have NO RIGHT to say we aren't blessed. We are adopted by God. And if you are reading this post and you don't know if the Savior has saved you, let Him! Call upon His name. This nation may be in a state of confusion, but God's people are in God's hands, not in the hands of America. I am BLESSED and always will be, no matter if I'm sick, persecuted, lonely or whatever our minds can come up with. I'm a child of God.