Friday, May 30, 2014

If I Have a Son

It's the question every expectant mother longs to answer. Is the baby a boy? A girl?

As the last few months have passed, I've become so very curious. It took so long for the truth that we are having a baby to actually sink in that I didn't even think or imagine about whether it was a boy or a girl. The fact that we had waited for so long was enough to just make the fact that a new life was joining our family enough to thrill me for weeks.

But now... I can't help but wonder. Josh and I will be overjoyed with a son or a daughter. Yet, I've been thinking, HOW am I supposed to raise a son or a daughter? I've been praying that God will give us all we need for the task.

My sister, Kandace, seems to think I am having a boy... in fact, my whole family agrees with her. I was thinking about boys. I have had a brother for 6 years, but a year and a half of that I have lived five hours away from him. It didn't take long after we adopted Andrew for me to see that boys are drastically different from girls. Especially since I have spent so much of my life with sisters and cousins who are girls. So other than my little experience with Andrew, I don't know a lot about boys.

I have spent the last few months teaching in schools every few weeks about abstaining from sexual activity and saving your heart until marriage with the LIFEguard team. I have had the opportunity to be around quite a few 7th grade and 9th grade boys. Now I'm naive to some things and happily so. I was homeschooled every year of my schooling and never spent time in public school, but while I taught the boys about how to treat a lady or the benefit of saving their hearts and protecting their future wife's hearts, I was surprised to find that many of the boys were lacking almost all respect and honor for others... including young ladies. I also noticed that boys seem to have few goals and little ambition when asked what they want for their future. Some said, "Can I play video games all day? Can that be a job?"

This was what I observed over many many schools and then I observed that this behavior and nonchalant-ness stretched far beyond these grades and these schools. This epidemic of boyish immaturity is among men of all ages and backgrounds.

The days of boys having fathers that push and challenge have slipped away over the decades. Boys are encouraged to just be boys and play video games, speak crudely and be disrespectful. These cute boys grow up to be teenagers taller than "Mama" with a manifestation of complete selfishness and immaturity and a desire to buck against authority.

If it was just the sons of the lost and not the sons of Christians, then I wouldn't be quite so concerned, but it isn't just the lost... it's the "saved" as well.

So my son. If the child is a boy, then I am so burdened that he know one thing. This one thing that too many Christian parents are forgetting to pass on. God doesn't give us sons just so they can do all the things average boys do and then grow up and be an average man. I want my son to know that he has a purpose. That purpose is to do God's will and bring glory to God. Now that is broad, I know. It seems like a given and it should be. But why isn't it?

My son will be an imperfect human. Nevertheless, he was made in the image of God and according to the Word of God, he was given a mission unique to him. Therefore I pray that we will always fill him with Scripture, challenge him to grow into a man after God's heart, expect him to respect others (including elders and women), teach him to work hard and remind him that he is loved unconditionally and so strongly by God, his father and me.

Generations to come are counting on this generation to do something different than what's been done over the past few decades. I don't need a stack of books on "how to raise boys"; I need the Bible and the Bible alone.

My son will know that he is here on this earth with a purpose that goes beyond this world. I pray that his eyes will light up one day when he realizes the gift of life Jesus gives him and that he will seek to serve Him all of his days.

Because dear friends, if you "train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it." I love that (Proverbs 22:6) in the ESV, because it says "even." Even when he is old... He won't depart from it for a time and come back. He will walk with the Lord all the days of his life and even when he is old he won't depart from it.

If it's a boy.... Now what if it's a girl? That's coming up next.